Personality Disorders Support Group

In all honesty, it is hard for me to remember how I lived with all that pain for so many years. I dealt mostly by cutting. Not a solution I recommend. I think finding others who understand what you are feeling is one of the best things. Any group therapy should help, I recommend DBT. It was designed by someone with DBT to treat people with DBT. I was skeptical, but it has made a huge difference in my life. My husband is amazed at the changes that have happened in me. Not only do I act more sane, I feel so much more calm and capable of dealing with things life throws at me. It can take time and hard work, but getting help is the only way to really make things better. I wouldn't probably not be alive today if it weren't for my psychiatrist, my DBT group therapists, and the DBT group themselves. They were an amazing group of individuals. I just hope you will find the same things I did.

I wish I had some good advice. The only things that really help me are God and my family. If I didn't have those two, I probably would kill myself. The ways I deal are not ways I want to encourage, so I'm not going to disclose them. I would recommend finding a support group in real life (DBT or otherwise) and stay consistent in that and in therapy. Find people you love who love you and will support you. You can get through this, it's just going to be a long, hard battle. If you ever need a friend, I'm happy to be here for you. God bless.

Wow I'm not the only one with a deltaile life inside my head, there are times that I don't wan't to wake up. Comeing here and talking about it is a step. Like others said looking for therpy is a good thing, but look for someone/place that deals with borderlines as some don't know how to deal with us or just plane out not like or belive in borderlines( I have first hand experamce woth a pro who hated borderlines, not a nice experance) There are some books on what this illness ia and some of the treatments that are out there. There is a good one that came out in '07 dalles The BLPD Survival Guide that i'm reading now and BPD Dissmistived(pardon my spelling) that came out in'04. Both are exelent and offer lots of hope where earler books said this dissorder was like a death knell. It's not but it is tricky to deal with. I'm almost at the point that I will no longer be classified as a borderline. It's 7 years of hard work, but very worth the effort of going outside my comfort zone. Mental illness are not a death sentance and BPD isn't as bad as it was made to be in the past. Stick in there and find help you're worth it!

One of the best things I can suggest is try and truely accept what is reality and what you can not change. A wise person once told me when you stop fighting the pain lessens. It doesn't mean giving up it just simply means accept who you are and don't try to fight yourself. People always tell me to love myself and I still haven't achieved that but I have come to terms with the fact that I am going to experiance things much stronger than other people and my experiance will probably last longer. So I have to allow myself the time and space to process and calm down. Like any thing in life it's a growing process. You'll get there. Look into DBT it's the best known therapy going for BPD

I live everyday with my emotions going from one extreme to the next...there is no middle ground...no gray..just black and white...now this has gotten quite a bit worse in the past several months because of a loss i suffered...but well before this loss i had been dealing with this...for me, what seemed to be minut to many was almost ALWAYS so much more intense for me...everything was always MORE...good or bad...MORE was the key...

I honestly don't know how i am still here today...i know i have some not good coping habits which i try to fight against doing everyday...somedays are easier than others...i have also been hospitalized several times because i just lost touch w/reality and saw the only way to end this pain was to end me...

So i guess i can't really offer any sound advice...but please do know that there are many of us here who have been and are being faced with much of the same painful feelings...i think you can find a lot of support because of this..also because these are some of the most caring individuals i've met...

I can understand the last statement that you made. "How can I deal with this when it hurts so, so bad?" That's how I feel when I go through the intense emotions that run my life, the severe anger towards myself but that I put on others both physically and emotionally, and hating myself so much that I dont think I'll ever be good enough for anyone. Once I started reading books on BPD and understanding what disease I have is when things started getting better, but what really helped me was getting into intensive treatment for a year and continue with it now through once a week sessions with a DBT therapist. BPD is what I have, and what I once thought was a life sentence like a death sentence is now trying to understand myself with BPD.

HI...FOR ME I LOVE TO DAYDREAM..AND I BELIEVE THE MORE YOU THINK OF SOMETHING THE MORE IT COULD HAPPEN....ALSO BACK WHEN I WAS FIRST DIAGNOSED...I WOULD GO BACK IN TIME TO THE YEAR 1945....IF I WAS SITTING IN A BAR SAY...EVERYTHING CHANGED RIGHT BEFORE MY EYES..A CIGARETTE GIRL EVEN CAME UP TO ME..OUTSIDE ALL THE CARS WERE OLDER...I DON'T KNOW WHY...OR HOW IT HAPPENED..I DID TELL MY SHRINK..AND HE SAID...DO YOU READ? I SAID YES. HE SAID WHAT KIND OF STORIES...AND BINGO...ALL MY NOVELS I WAS INTO AT THAT TIME WERE BASED IN LIVERPOOL IN THE 1940'S....LOVE STORIES...THE STRUGGLE WITH THE WAR AND HOW EVERYONE HELPED EACH OTHER OUT..AND I FELT COMFORTABLE IN THAT TIME PERIOD...SO IT BECAME MY REALITY...I WAS ONCE TOLD THAT I AM A GENIUS THAT IF I WAS ANY SMARTER I WOULD BE NUTS...WILD...BUT IF I WERE YOU...I WOULD NOT THINK NEGATIVE AND SAY WHAT YOU DAYDREAM ABOUT CAN NEVER COME TRUE...LIFE IS STRANGE...MAYBE YOU ARE THINKIN THOSE THOUGHTS FOR A REASON...IF I WERE YOU..I WOULD JUST SIT BACK AND ENJOY...CUZ LIKE I SAID LIFE..IS SO STRANGE THAT ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN...AND IT DOES...TELL YOURSELF IT COULD HAPPEN..ITS ALL UP TO YOU...YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MOOD IN A BLINK OF AN EYE...JUST BY CHANGING YOUR THOUGHTS....WELL HOPE THAT HELPS..OR DID I JUST CONFUSE THE HELL OF OUT YA...LOL...NO REALLY THO...ALL THE BEST HANG IN THERE...IM AROUND IF YOU WANT TO TALK...PEACE JESSEOX

hey jesseMM, i just wanted to thank you for your reply because, first of all it did help, and second i just really liked hearing from someone that what i daydream is actually possible. if you went back in time, it may even be a possibility that real magic, adventure and relationships that i want can touch my life too. thank you--you gave me some much needed hope.

This is something I am also wondering. So I guess I don't have any real words of wisdom for you. For me everything just hurts so bad and there seems no way out of the pain. I too do a lot of living in my head, my own little world I've created. I've done so much crazy stuff in my life I can't believe I'm still alive... but I'm still here trying to figure it all out. I was about to join a DBT group but and was really hoping that would help but two days ago I found out that my doctor will not approve it for me unless I go to a bunch of other groups which I don't feel I need or have time for . I'm really upset about this because i've heard DBT is quite helpful. Looks like I'll never get the chance to find out. Just take it one day at a time and hang in there, we have to believe we are not broken and can get better. Sorry this wasn't much help to you, but I really identify with what you say.