What is Multiple-Personalities
Dissociative identity disorder is a diagnosis described as the existence in an individual of two or more distinct identities or personalities, each with its own...
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Friday July 25, 2008
STORY WALL
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Journal Entry for July 25, 2008
lost, want to die, want to shut off the thoughts, want it all to end, want what I can't have...peace
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More »LATEST STORIES
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lost, want to die, want to shut off the thoughts, ...
Tor Jul 25, 2008
Journal Entry for July 25, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
lost, want to die, want to shut off the thoughts, want it all to end, want what I can't have...peace -
the urge to be someone else, to just pretend, and ...
Electroch... Jul 25, 2008
Journal Entry for July 25, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
the urge to be someone else, to just pretend, and be something im not is really growing.
i've sort of got over my phase of compulsive lying, and telling people things that wernt really but i really feel like im starting to do it again, just start saying thigns that arent true. pretending to be someone else, sounds nice
sounds nice to be someone else
to just allow myself to be someone else
doesnt ... -
I woke up this morning with a pit in my stomach......
angeleyes08 Jul 25, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
I woke up this morning with a pit in my stomach... my chest aches. I have no idea why today is so hard... I don't remember yesterday or the day before being this bad! It's even rivalling the night he broke up with me....
I talked to him briefly the other night (not last night).... this is the longest we've ever gone without seeing or talking to each other. He normally called me everyda... -
....i want to cut myself...things on the outside a...
e4now Jul 25, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008 |
....i want to cut myself...things on the outside are looking up for me...why cant i be happy with my accomplishments...i need to hurt...most times i just feel like a failure REGARDLESS of what is going on in my life...i am sick...thoughts in my head overtake me...i want to die... i just want to die...i imagine me getting into horrible stuations...i crave that last breath to be taken from me....wh...
1 Recommendation
1 Comment -
Last night at 730 pm I had an OMG aura and landed ...
hugsneeded Jul 25, 2008
Seizure and how angry I am at the DR. Tatum
Friday, July 25, 2008 |
Last night at 730 pm I had an OMG aura and landed hard face first on the floor began crying help...help....help, in a weak voice and then I began to seizure. I began to convulse, and went in and out of consciousness. My heart pouned so hard, I sweat so much thru the whole things but no heart attack. Anyway I am better today, just miffed that the doctor guilted me to thinking I d...1 Recommendation -
~~TODAY'S SCRIPTURE~~ II Corinthians...
starfish Jul 25, 2008
Journal Entry for July 25, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
~~TODAY'S SCRIPTURE~~
II Corinthians 1 : 8-11
8. We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we dispaired even of life.
9. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves...1 Comment -
I took the transit train to an area I really like ...
starfish Jul 25, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
I took the transit train to an area I really like today, but I've never been actually walking around in the community, so I did that, and still really like it. So now, I have something to aim for, when I ask for help with housing. I sure hope I can move out there. It is as far as the bus will go, and then I can catch the transit train and still get to my dr. If I can l...5 Comments -
I am making some progress here. I made and kept my...
ShawnC32 Jul 24, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
I am making some progress here. I made and kept my Social Sec appt and was actually reasonably prepared. I no longer allow certain people to be involved in my care. I have started DBT and CBT courses online. I am calling a therapist tomorrow and will also be contacting the hospital about payment arrangements. I am working on making goals and also breaking stuff down into manageable parts. -
well here shortly it will be time to take my meds....
ShawnC32 Jul 24, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008 |
well here shortly it will be time to take my meds. They have bumped my remeron way up from 15 mg to 45 ms.My trazadone has been removed and my lithium doubled, hopefully this will work as the next appt I have is in 8 wks. My Dr insists I call a therapist tomorrow and has even taken the list of possibilities away and just gave me one name. Fun, t-docs make me nervous they are more observant thus h...1 Recommendation -
So I have a "friend"... I've known h...
angeleyes08 Jul 24, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008 |
So I have a "friend"... I've known her for about 6 months now but we're very close. We tell each other everything.... EVERYTHING. I know when she's cheating on her boyfriend, she knows when I think I'm pregnant. EVERYTHING. So she talked to both of us on MSN... kind of our marriage counsellor online lol She'd get both sides of the story and "prescribe" some...1 Recommendation1 Comment -
Since some people on here dont know me and keep se...
ShawnC32 Jul 24, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Since some people on here dont know me and keep sending me questions about myself heres a brief run down.I am 33 unhappily married and have 2 children one of whom lives with me. I am short fat pale and ugly. I live in a town where there is only a post office and I am sure the majority of residents have been rejected by Jerry Springer. I have a house with a small yard and some chickens, and a roos... -
I have a little hope now, due to two new DS friend...
angeleyes08 Jul 24, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
I have a little hope now, due to two new DS friends that make me believe that I can do this. I WILL FIND A JOB, and I can feel better about myself. Probably. lol1 Comment
Journal Entry for July 25, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
lost, want to die, want to shut off the thoughts, want it all to end, want what I can't have...peace -
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More »VIDEO STORIES
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Sad and Angry, So So Angry. I miss my baby. This is a song for my baby. RIP lil JL soz I cant sing
Friday, May 9, 2008
by: lastehopem a Painful Story
1 Recommendation7 Comments -
5 Comments
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More »MEMBERS IN NEED
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so their is this guy. i hooked up with him at my friend Helen's party. i don't hook up with ppl. i've only kissed like 1 other guy in my entire life, and i didn't like him. so here is the whole story
I wen't to my friend Helen's house, because she just finished ehr basement so we could chill without her parents evesdropping. so i'm a little nervous because she decides to play spin the bottle, its...1 Recommendation1 Comment
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More »INSPIRATIONAL STORIES
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I am going to start this week positive!!! I think I can find myself!!!1 Recommendation
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More »POETRY CORNER
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Cold chains against my warm skin.My body, twisted ...
Lillyana Mar 04, 2008
Tuesday, March 4, 2008 |
Cold chains against my warm skin.
My body, twisted within my mind.
Fear grips my heart.
A blind over my eyes, yet my ears can see all.
I can hear the tree's, dancing softly in the wind, yet i dont feel athing
I can hear the birds, singing with the breze happy, content, togtehter.
The air gets cold, the laughter, like knives in my fleash.
Im not as alone as i feel i am.
For a dark shadow falls over my...1 Recommendation7 Comments -
Screams echo off the walls of my mind. pleading fo...
Lillyana May 13, 2008
Tuesday, May 13, 2008 |
Screams echo off the walls of my mind.
pleading for the tears to flow, to ease the pain within.
I take a sharp breath that shakes with fear and hopelessness,
I can feel them building, as my bottom lip trimbles in pain,
that is only echoed within my heart.
I hold my hands to my ears, My lost eyes closed tightly.
My teeth clinch, barring to the pain that haunts my soul.
"TOO HELL WITH YOU!!!"
...1 Recommendation4 Comments -
i talked to you before,and here i am again,i had a...
MtianExpl... Mar 15, 2008
A Further Talk With The Other Part Of Me...
Saturday, March 15, 2008 |
i talked to you before,
and here i am again,
i had asked you who you could be,
you who are part, of this other part of me.
can you and i be one?
united as a single entity?
i feel thankful,
to be able to talk to you,
and it seems that it is you,
whom i want to address?
i feel confused today,
and in the present times,
can you help me remove,
the confusion that obscures my mind?
i want to ask again,
who you can be...1 Recommendation2 Comments -
Some hope, and some despair Resting on your should...
FANTASTIC... Mar 03, 2008
Journal Entry for March 3, 2008
Monday, March 3, 2008
Some hope, and some despair Resting on your shoulder. And it laughs in your face.
the printed word might kill you, The whispering, May hurt you. Who am I that I come to be here...?
Just the bad things, oh...There must be something
Horribly wrong with me ?
The sanest days are mad Everyone's oh so quick with advice. Cruel imagination is still giving me pain. Sometimes I ri...2 Recommendations1 Comment -
I am not just a freak show, I am in my primitive y...
hugsneeded Jul 12, 2008
Saturday, July 12, 2008 |
I am not just a freak show, I am in my primitive years
Maybe you are so disconnected like me that you cant feel
maybe it is time to cast the ship away
cast far away that you cant be seen crying in the mounting meltdown the is coming
It is a big pile of s--t that smells so bad calcutta even notices it
Alone in this
NO one seems to really reach the depth of my soul
and missing G-d in this
The protector t...1 Recommendation1 Comment -
this is the song i had him listen to... Oh I ...
Abbagail Jul 12, 2008
Saturday, July 12, 2008 |
this is the song i had him listen to...
Oh I had alot to say
Was thinking on my time away
I missed you and things weren't the same
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry it makes me wanna die.
I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all...1 Recommendation1 Comment -
walking along the path of destrution.lit by the sh...
bloodyand... Jun 25, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008 |
walking along the path of destrution.
lit by the shimmering glare of the moon that hides within the shadowed clouds.
I walk on.
dogs nip at my feet. my skin shivers within the black silk gown that wraps my body.the cold wind blows my hair as I walk with slowness to the ocean. as I walk slowly to the boat that awaits me. I Remember my time with humans.I remember all that I will leave behind.
looking b...1 Recommendation1 Comment -
when does banging your head sound like fun, ...
Lillyana May 31, 2008
Saturday, May 31, 2008 |
when does banging your head sound like fun, when is pulling your hair out sound like a great idea? When does saying *uck it to school sound like the best plan in the world? When does telling everyone to just *uck off and leave me the hell alone, sound like a blessing? when does hate and pain turn to lust and joy? when does blackness turn to all you see, and blood something you dream to tast...1 Recommendation1 Comment -
My family is the exact deference of me ...
Tsumi Apr 24, 2008
Thursday, April 24, 2008 |
My family is the exact deference of me
My family cares for me
But I could care less about them
My family thinks about the happy times
All I can think about are the sad times
My family dreams about the great life they hope to have
I dream about the day
I’m going to die
My family loves the sunI can’t stand it
My family enjoys being together
I ...1 Recommendation1 Comment -
Sometimes i wonder where are u GodSometimes i wond...
Surviving... Jul 18, 2008
Friday, July 18, 2008 |
Sometimes i wonder where are u God
Sometimes i wonder why?
Sometimes i wonder if i have a purpose
Sometimes i wonder why my dad did this to me
Sometimes i wonder when i will get over this
Sometimes i wonder will i ever have children
Sometimes i wonder why?
Sometimes i cry all the time
Sometimes i laugh
Sometimes i run, run, run, run
Sometimes i isolate myself
Sometiems i wonder God why do u love me?
Sometime...1 Recommendation -
this is a song i mostly wanted him to listen too w...
Abbagail Jul 12, 2008
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing by Jack Johnson
Saturday, July 12, 2008 |
this is a song i mostly wanted him to listen too when he was abuseing me, but i never got him too. there are still times were i want him to hear it, but i don't know if he would really listen to the lyrics like he did with the Buckcherry song.
Well I was sitting, waiting, wishing You believed in superstitions Then maybe you'd see the signs The Lord knows that this world is cruel I ain...1 Recommendation -
Stuffed BunnyAfter becoming confused And not knowi...
Tsumi Jun 03, 2008
Tuesday, June 3, 2008 |
Stuffed Bunny
After becoming confused
And not knowing what to do
He sat alone with his stuffed bunny at his side
Pretending it was the person he cared about
He lay alone in his bed holding it close
And crying
How is it that stuffed animals
Can seam 2 take the pain away?
But the pain always comes back
Worse then before
Drinking/eating away the pain
He sat with his friends
Watched them play ball
He sat on the c...1 Recommendation
Tuesday, March 4, 2008 |
Cold chains against my warm skin.
My body, twisted within my mind.
Fear grips my heart.
A blind over my eyes, yet my ears can see all.
I can hear the tree's, dancing softly in the wind, yet i dont feel athing
I can hear the birds, singing with the breze happy, content, togtehter.
The air gets cold, the laughter, like knives in my fleash.
Im not as alone as i feel i am.
For a dark shadow falls over my...1 Recommendation7 Comments -
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