Miscarriage Support Group

I feel guilty about being happy a lot. espically when the holidays come. but i think that they would want us to be happy and to move on with our lifes. just like how when we pass on we would want our children to go on and live life.

You know I don't. I am more scared of loosing "Widgets" brother or sister if we do get pregnant again, or if I don't get pregnant at all. But guilty...not yet...

I feel guilty whenever I think about having another baby someday. I feel like I would be having a replacement child and also I have a huge fear that I would have another m/c. I don't know how I would handle another one. But like Jamie said, I think that Morgan would want me to be happy and move on with my life. But still sometimes the guilt gets to me.

Sometimes I do feel guilty about being happy...especially since the m/c is so recent. But I try to remember that it's okay to be happy, and it's a healthy part of the healing process. We will never forget what we lost, but we also can't stop living our lives. I try to think of what my baby would want for me...I know she's up there right now, looking down on me and my husband, and only wishing us happiness. I want the very best for my own mother, and I'm sure that's what my child wants for me. So when I have those happy moments and I stop myself for a moment by feeling guilty, I remember my baby and how she would want me to live my life.
We also are planning on ttc again in a few months. In a way I feel guilty about this as well, but even if we do get pregnant again and it's successful, a new baby will never replace the memories of the one we lost. She will live in our hearts forever, and nothing will replace her memory.

I am about to TTC and am feeling very guilty as well, but here's the funny thing I realized when I was feeling really guilty. Our babies would never want us not to be happy again, not to have more children, and that makes it a litte easier to feel happy and to try again.

After I lost the twins and tried again, I didn't feel guilty at all. I figured they would want me to be happy. When I lost the second pregnancy, I was devastated. Now I am trying again and my IUI is scheduled, as of right now, on the due date of my twins. I am not really sure how I feel about that yet. I don't think it's guilt... I still believe my lil angels want me to be happy and want to continue this journey. I don't know...I believe our lil ones are cheering us on and want us to have our heart's desire. We are not forgetting them.

Thanks ladies. I am thinking after reading all your posts that maybe it isn't guilt but like Jakeswife said...maybe it is fear more then anything. After I lost my first I had a really hard time right after the loss...I was still crying daily after 6wks. With my 2nd loss I felt numb to it all...it didn't hit me the same way...I guess I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Now that we have no embryos left & we have to pick another donor & start the whole process over I feel more daunted by the whole process this time. Not to mention that our next ET is tentatively set for the end of July...which is exactly one year from my first ET. I just don't want to get my hopes up so I kind of try to forget about the whole thing & focus on happier things right now. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me!