What is Miscarriage Stillbirth

Miscarriage or spontaneous abortion is the natural or accidental termination of a pregnancy at a stage where the embryo or the fetus is incapable of surviving, ...

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Well it has been 3 months since my miscarriage and i thought i was you know getting over it well crying when i need to talking to my friend and all. Last night i think i completely snapped i just feel like there is so way to mend this hurt i had one of my friends (male) tell me he couldnt understand why i wasnt over this already and i blew up on him i bleed for a month straight after i lost my angel my body i still cant tell whats going on with it! Im stationed in Korea a whole different counrty i just feel lost and so far away and bitter as hell i hate everything dont even want to put on my uniform that i am proud of and go to work. What can i do???
Posted on 05/16/08, 12:05 am
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Reply #1 - 05/16/08  10:45am
" When I felt like this what helped me was to face my sadness. I know it sounds like a cliche but that was what was creating all the anger. I took a day to just sit in the bed and write in my diary and cry and read a book about m/c "emtpy cradle broken heart". It was so healing that I felt almost normal the next day. My counselor told me that if I take time to grieve each day such as crying or writing in a journal about my feelings this should help and I am finding this true ever since. It is normal not to be "over it" for a long time. Good luck "
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Reply #2 - 05/16/08  11:00am
" I know exactly how you feel. I have times where I think I am doing well and then someone will say something that will cause me to snap. My body is also still messed up and I think that adds to the stress. You need time by yourself to relax. Within time the snapping settles down and begins to happen a little less. Hang in there and feel free to message me at anytime. You're in my thoughts & prayers. "
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Reply #3 - 05/16/08  11:22am
" I know all about the 'you should be over this by now' garbage. Probably everybody here does. There is no set time on how long we need to grieve. Everybody is different on that score. Unfortunately unless someone has been through a m/c they have know idea what it is like. We are all here for you when you need to vent. "
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Reply #4 - 05/16/08  5:43pm
" I'm sorry to about your loss Divine. It is going to be a long road. I lost my baby about a month before you. I still have bad days that I struggle to get through. My husband acts like my miscarriage never happened. Understand that some people don't understand of they just stick their foot in their mouth. I don't think most men understand a loss like this. I think women are given a whole different capacity to love a child than a man. For women love starts at conception. Try to find someone to talk to, someone who will listen and let you cry. I found this in my female friends who have also had a miscarriage. Once I told my friends, I found out I wasn't the only one. What support I didn't get from my husband I got from them. Let yourself cry. Writing does help. I made a little memory box and wrote a letter to the baby I lost. I felt angry at god and the world but I still prayed for strength and understanding. Eventually reading the bible has helped give me a comfort that I couldn't get from anywhere else (Isaiah 54). I don't know if this helped you but know that your not alone. Even though you can't see us women know that we are walking down a similar path and we support you. "
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Reply #5 - 05/16/08  8:01pm
" Hello. I am new to the website and I have truly found it comforting to find others who have been through what I have. I just lost 2 babies in less than 2 months (no, we didn't avoid conceiving again after the 1st miscarriage) and I personally don't know anyone that has had a miscarriage. Knowing that others share the grief that I do has helped me some. I just found out yesterday that my current pregnancy (the 2nd one) is ectopic. This is very difficult for my husband and I and we chose not to tell anyone of the 2nd pregnancy (we wanted to wait until I was 4 months) and so we haven't told anyone of the ectopic. I just don't feel that they will be able to understand the pain we're feeling. I know that this may sound selfish or bad, but the only thing that makes me feel "not so bad" is knowing that there are so many others that are in worse situations than I am and that things could've been a lot worse for me. I watch the news and hear about the earthquake in China or tragedies in other parts of the world and I give thanks to God for not being in that situation. I try and think of the good things that I have been blessed with that perhaps others don't have (a wonderful husband, a loving family, supportive parents). I hope that we can all find some peace in our hearts and remember our lost child(ren) without having the pain we have now. "
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