Mental retardation is a term for a pattern of persistently slow learning of basic motor and language skills ("milestones") during childhood, and a significantly below-normal global...
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acceptance
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i'm 18 and my 21 year old sister is mildy mentally challenged. its just always been so hard for me to be the younger sister but always have to play the role of the older sister. i've spent my entire life succeeding- in school, sports, frienships, love... as perfect as it may sound, its been just awful. i spend so much time feeling guilty, deperately wishing that she could out-do me just once. i've been away at college all year and i've felt just awful leaving her behind. she has the tendency to be socially awkward and doesn't get out much unless i initiate plans with our "mutual" friends. since i've been home for the summer, i've had a really hard time dealing with her... seeing her, listening her say all the things that make me feel so angry and so sad at the same time. i'm just trying to accept the fact that this is the way she is. i'm trying so hard to forget my hopes that someday things will be different with her, because they won't. i love her, i really do, but sometimes i find that loving her just hurts way too much. i'm not really looking for any answers because there really aren't any. just some support would be nice.
i'm really trying to have a better, more positive outlook on life. slowly but surely, its working. i hope everyone out there finally finds all that they are looking for. Posted on 05/28/08, 12:05 am |
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Hi,
It was very touching to read your discussion entry. I am the mother of a 12 yr old with significant delays due to Downs Syndrome and I also have a 9 (soon to be 10) yr old daughter. She is very protective of her brother and considers herself the "older" sister and they have been playmates since she was a baby. She gets very sensitive when someone misuses the "R" word. I often tell my oldest son of 17 and my 9 yr old daughter that I don't expect them to care for their brother when they are older, but it is important that they are involved. For instance, after I am too old to care for him, to oversee his care in whatever setting he is in and involve him in holiday and family gatherings. If he is in a group home I feel his care will be better if workers know there is a concerned family they have to answer to. I think your sister is truly blessed to have such a careing sister. Try not to be so hard on yourself. You deserve to enjoy your life. Try to find a balance between being there for your sister when your home and enjoying yourself when you are at school. My oldest son will face many of these feelings next year when he heads off to college. I am encouraging him to go away to college just so he can experience a normal life for a change. I hope it helps you to know that others have similar situations and can understand how you feel. 
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