This community is dedicated to the relationship challenges that lesbian women face, both between the partners in a relationship and from other influences (family, society, etc.). ...
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Cancer Vs. Gay
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I have been trying to put so many things in my life in perspective and I just want to share a couple of things with whomever stumbles across this.
I have been on this site for quite some time now and am amazed at the heartache that I see and read. So many people are hurting because they have been hurt by someone or are being hurt by numerous people. We (myself included) all need to be thnkful for what we have in the here and the now. The reason I say this is not to get on a soap box but only to share something with all of you. I am 39 yrs. old and in May of this year was diagnosed with termianl cancer. My whole life ended in that doctors office. All I could think of doing was running as far away from there as possible. I ran, straight back to work and continued my daily duties while I was litterally dying inside. I wanted to be held, I wanted to cry and I wanted to run away where no one knew me. Sure, I had the answers I had been looking for but I was so angry and definitley confused. Any of this sounding familiar to anyone that is coming out, trying to cope or coming out of a relationship? This is what we do, it is our natural defense to run and hide. I struggle everyday with my ego and my sense of being. I just want to live the life I "had" B.C. (before cancer) but it is becoming more and more apparent every day that is not possible. I want to put a little glimmer of hope in someones life this evening and tell you that life is greener on the other side of the septic tank....lol, it can just be a mushy walk getting there. Put yourselves first and all the cliches that we hate so much do take on a new meaning, such as things happen for a reason, we dont get anything we cant handle, this is what will make us stronger, etc. We will all survive, we may just struggle a little more than we are use to. Lean on people and no not shut people out. I am working on this as well as I am extremely self sufficient and learning real quick that it is ok to ask for help and support. If there are 12 steps in any program I used all 12 getting to this site. This site has been inspirational and motivating to me. We are all family with our own set of issues. One is not greater than the other or easier to deal with, we all just deal differently. As with cancer there is no correct way to deal with this. You learn by trial and error. We can only grab from each others experiences but most importnantly learn from ourselves. Put yourself first, love yourself first and know that we are all in each others corner(s). I challenge each and everyone of you to make a difference in someones life today, even if you think it is miniscule. Hope and health to all! Posted on 11/08/07, 10:11 pm |
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cancr is a word that everyone dreads i can understand what you are saying but can only imagine what you are going through you are very brave and please keep on posting we are all your friends here 
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wow, you are a blessing to us all.
thank you. xxoo
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brutus,
I completely feel your pain. I was diagnosed in may this year with Myeloma, it is also terminal. I also had a long term relationship falling apart. She had been my first and struggled with ending it. I am now alone and struggle everyday with the thought of dying alone. My family is supportive about my health but do not accept my sexuality. I know your pain and have just this week decided I need to get going and get ready for the fight of my life against this cancer. If you ever need to vent I will definitely listen and can completely understand where you are coming from. Hope and health to you also! Terri
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I saved my response to your most excellent share so I could get it bumped to the top again....lets keep bumping this one up for a while ...OK?
THANK YOU! Your post can be a wake up call for those here that are so wrapped up in their pain they cant see straight or are so sure that they are victims in life. You challenge this by your example. We weren't meant to go it alone. The 12 steps give us this gft of knowing our higher power and never being alone again. To your health!!!!!
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Just me again, I really hope some people are inspired to truly reach out and help others and use the golden rule. Life is short.....LIVE HARD!
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