Infidelity Support Group

We live in a town small enough where everyone knows someone you know. I actually told my family I was leaving...my daughter spend hours crying on phone with her friends whose parents know us. The OM & W split up and everyone who knows them knows why. I know that everywhere I go people will look at me differently than they did. In many ways I am glad. I have a very good reputation, good mother, good wife, good person, and after doing something like this it would have bothered me to just act like I was still that person. I want people to know the truth and then they can decide if they still want to associate with me or not. I don't want to fool anyone. My H is standing by my side and we are working things out. Many of my friends are very supportive, some don't mention it, some haven't talked to me. That is their choice.

i never told my parents because i didnt want them to treat him different we told the children because they were in the house i told a few close friends as i needed support but i wished i had not told one of them,but who are we protecting? Us or them

We all need someone to talk to (and this support group is good), but telling family is a big step.

As Nades said "i didnt want them to treat him different". Depends on your family: If they are likely to be very protective or judgemental, your relationship will have to bust through that too, before it can recover.

I am all for some exposure because it casts light on the lies and gives some ongoing judgement for the cheater, but don't burn your bridges if you want to get over it. I didn't tell anyone we have to see regularly.

For me and my husband telling hasn't been a real big issue. I had to tell my children because unfortunately they were home when the OW called the house to talk to their dad after I found out about the affair, they heard way too much.
But a friend of mine in the same situation ran into lots of problems from telling her family her H actually lost his job because of it, her family hated him totally, none of this made it easier for them to work it out.

I told my parents about my affair, as well as a few friends, one co-worker and one of my sisters. That was before I got caught.

Everybody knew she was up to something, and when it came to light, they were disappointed, but not suprised. So, I told everybody, and still tell the truth when somebody asks!! If she ever comes back into my life, it is a decision I made, and who cares what others might think, as it is my life. Her A destroyed everything she knew as her solid foundation, and she has a lot of rebuilding to do. I still have all the support for being honest with the whole situation.

I didn't tell anyone about my fiance cheating on me for 6 weeks and i was pregnant, it nearly killed me. I think everyone should be open about it and then there's no secrets anymore as that is what feeds the need to have another secret life...... I say shout it from the roof tops and then there's little chance of it happening again.