Infertility is the inability to naturally conceive a child or the inability to carry a pregnancy to term. There are many reasons why a couple may not be able to conceive, or may no...
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fed up, angry, emotional – the usual!
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Sorry to sound depressing. Yesterday I went to see my sister's baby - just one day old. He's so beautiful and so perfect. The whole family were there and all so happy. I was happy too, it was a lovely day.
Today I wake up and get those pains that tell me IUI no. 2 has failed. And I feel like absolute crap. Seeing the baby yesterday just made me realise how much I really want this and what it means to me. I want everybody to be that happy about me and my child, and I want to be feeling how my sister is feeling - but I don't think it's ever going to happen for me. How do I get over that sense of loss and emptiness? My body is useless. And I feel so angry that it's so unfair - I really hate being angry. It's hard to stop crying today. How the hell can I get any work done??? I know I won't feel like this forever but today is pretty crappy, and I know people on here will understand. x Posted on 05/14/08, 10:05 am |
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I understand completely. I think if you feel as if you aren't going to be able to get anything done, then don't. Just see if you can go home early and spend the day being however emotional you need to be. I think the catharsis I allow myself when I'm feeling miserable (and I no longer make any apologies for) is the only way that I can continue ttc. It's perfectly acceptable for you to be upset and frustrated and angry and anything else you're feeling. Give yourself that permission and then just let it flow. 
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Sweetie it's okay to vent,cry,and feel emotional, especially after holding that baby in your arms. Just go home and relax and think positive. It will happen one day don't loose hope...
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It is never easy I am sorry you have to feel this pain right now but it is ok to cry and get upset it is a horrible feeling to feel like our bodies are working against us and it is so painful to deal with but I am so glad you actually got to enjoy your new newphew I know in the begining I stayed away when family had their babies my SIL had a baby and I refused to go to her house I didnt even see her baby till she was 6 months I just couldnt do it and it was horrible she lived 5 minutes away and we where close and she felt as if she had done something wrong but that wasnt the case. I hope you get your BFP and you can feel the joy your sister did. God~Bless!
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i totally understand what you are going through. i have had many of the same thoughts and still do. just remember you are allowed to cry and feel. i think the worst thing we can do is not let it out. this is such an up and down battle. i know it will happen one day for all of us.
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I just got my BFN too and I know how you feel. It is all SO frustrating! And I always feel so hopeless after a failed cycle. I allow myself full wallowing, crying, self-pity, eating tons of ice cream, etc. for 2 days... then I try to pick myself up, brush myself off, and move on to the future and the next cycle. Hang in there... you WILL survive this. xox
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