Sexual dysfunction or sexual malfunction is difficulty during any stage of the sexual act (which includes desire, arousal, orgasm, and resolution) that prevents the individual or c...
|
I really need help.
|
Watch this |
| View More Posts Ignore |
I have been with my husband since I was 15 years old. I am now 23, and we have two small boys, 3 and 1 years old. I've been having trouble with sex for awhile now, really since 2004ish when my father died. I dont know what happened to me. I used to like to have sex with my husband. We used to have intercourse regularly when we were dating, and we tried new things, had fun, etc. I got sick in 2005, and I found out I had a lung disorder. Since then I have really just had to fake wanting to have sex. I can't even orgasm most of the time. And if I do, I suddenly have a lubrication problem right after orgasm. This is so weird to me. All of my friends love having sex with their boyfriends/husbands, and oral sex, etc. but I just could live without it. As of January this year I was also diagnosed with chronic kidney stone disease. I have been passing stones for almost 4 years now. Yes it hurts and most days I feel like I have a bladder infection even if I dont. So I know that is a reason to not want to have sex. But where is the part of me that WANTS to even if I can't?? Like there's these women who have a baby and can't even wait the 6 weeks for the post partum check up... I was so glad I had 6 weeks to myself. Is this due to me being sick or do you think there is another problem? I mean, I don't want to lose my husband, he's the love of my life. We have been through hell and back and have made it out alive. I dont know. In February I had throat surgery and ever since then I have been losing weight.. drastically. Like so much that my wedding ring is falling off. Where has my life went? I'm too young to be so boring. What's the deal? Is there any medicines that help with sex drive? Is there an illness that goes with kidney problems that affects your hormones? Am I going insane? Ugh, help me.
Posted on 07/10/08, 01:07 am |
| 8 Replies | Add Your Reply |
| View More Posts Ignore |
As a person with health problems (endo and cysts) I feel for your pain. I know that is enough right there to kill a sex drive. ((hugs)) I hope something improves for you soon! 
|
|
|
|
||
| View More Posts Ignore |
Have you grieved the loss of your Dad? He is the the developmental love object, and ambivalent feelings could be the culprit.
|
|
|
|
||
| View More Posts Ignore |
|
|
|
|
||
| View More Posts Ignore |
A stab in the dark, but it sounds like - in a kind of symbolic way - your body has had a string of impositions in the form of those illnesses. So could your sexuality also have become almost like another illness- that is, something is forced upon you, that affects and alters you without your willing?
If so, it would make sense that you'd resist it, to 'fake wanting'. How to deal with that outside of some kind of therapeutic analysis, I don't know.
|
|
|
|
||
| View More Posts Ignore |
It is possible the problems are physiological. What does your doctor say? Have you seen an OB/GYN to determine if the kidney problem would impact sex?
|
|
|
|
||
| View More Posts Ignore |
Dang girl! Give yourself a break! I'd like to know of anyone who's been what you've been through, and keep up their sex drive! Be honest with your husband. If he loves you, he'll understand. Love is all about give-and-take. Life goes through seasons. Sounds like you're just going through a cold spot. I agree that you should discuss this with your doctor if you haven't. Could be your hormones are all messed up because of all of the other physical issues...
|
|
|
|
||
| View More Posts Ignore |
There is not much I can add to these lovely people's comments, but my heart goes out to you. You are voicing what so many of us experience.
I don't think medication is your answer. Unfortunately, intimacy issues are affected by stress, ill health, grief, metabolic changes....hey wait a minute....you have had all of these in bushels! I sure hope you are able to do 3 things. Love yourself as you are, talk honestly with your husband and get help. Feeling for you in Canada. Anurri
|
|
|
|
||
| View More Posts Ignore |
hi hun my name is leah and I am 21 years old. I don't have any physical illnesses or anything like that but i do have the same kind of problems as you. To be honest I have been having sex since I was 15 and have only had an orgasim once in my life. and i am married and my husband is the kind of guy who always wants sex. but i am like you i could live without sex, i never understood what the big thing is with it. sex always seems to hurt me. and like you i have a 2 year old daughter and after i had her i loved them few weeks that i couldn't have sex. I'm scared that i will lose my husband over this also, cause not only do i not want to have sex cause it hurts but i feel like i have no sex drive, i can't get horny for the life of me, and i know it's not my husbands fault cause it has been like this since i stated having sex. I feel your pain, we are to young to be going through this. I thought that i was alone in this and that no-one else had this problem, but i guess i was wrong. also i always have a really bad discharge and when i get my womenly check up and i tell my doctors anpout these prblems they say that my mund must of matured before my body. what does that mean i am 21 years old my body should be fully matured. i just want you to know your not alone. i have tried everything you can think of to help my sex life creams,jells toys you name it and nothing seems to work. i could live without sex but my husband can't and i don't expect him to.
|
|
|
|
||
Hi. Ever since I was put on Zoloft 6 weeks ago, I've been having problems with sex. Within a few days of starting it, …
I have not experienced an orgasm from penetration that I am aware of. Not a glimpse that I am aware of, no fireworks or …
I've been having sex for a few years now, and I have never experienced an orgasm. What can I do?
