Family Issues Support Group

DO NOT BELIEVE WHAT THESE PEOPLE ARE TELLING YOU. It is NOT your fault. You DO NOT deserve to be treated this way. I have been in a similar situation not the sexual abuse but the physical abuse. My father says it never happened and that I have made it all up. My sisters only remember bits and pieces but that is cause I took the brunt of the abuse. The best advise I can give you is to talk about it. If you don't talk about it to either friends, councelor...or anyone you will end up in a cycle that is hard to break.. I ended up marrying a verbally abusive husband who is an alcoholic and I am a recovering drug addict.

Please for your MENTAL state of mind TALK TO SOMEONE.

I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN! I'm here getting support for some of the same reasons. I was molested twice, once by my brother, when I told my mother, she didn't believe me. I was 6. Show me a six year old who knows about molestation and hasn't experienced it! My mother watched at her bfs and husbands beat me and then would say "you deserved it". I know I did not deserve that!
All I can say to you is the best way to rebel is not to. Throughout the years it has bugged my mother to no end to watch as I succeed and she's left in the dust. I bought my first home at 19. Got married at 20, and have been together since. I have an amazing 3 year old son. Mom's just a distant memory. Set yourself up for success. Don't let you past keep you from one hell of a future. You can acheive anything. The more you acheive, your mom will have to face the horrible job she did as your mother. Don't let anything stop you from being happy. Although you can't change the past, only you can stand in the way of your future.

I'm really sorry for you situation. This is definately is NOT your fault!! Sounds like you need to clear your head. Is there anyone you can confide in (other family/friends/someone close) or have you/are you seen a pyschologist? Talking about what has happened will help you process it all. That's where I'm at and it's taken me a long time to get to this point. I really wish you all the best.

You need to develop a strong sense of self. Sorry for everything you've been through. Your mom might have been in denial, bc she might not have had the strength to deal with it the way she would have liked. I think your foster mom might have been jealous of your relationship with her husband. It doesn't make what she said okay, but might be why she said it. Sometimes I've witnessed some of my friends who were abused act more sexual in public without noticing it, or regular people flirting without realizing they're doing it. People sometimes don't know that they're acting sexually and other women can become easily intimidated by that. Either way you have to leave the past behind you. Remember you are a survivor and have the inner strength to go for your dreams. It can be hard when you don't have the family support and guidance, but you can blaze your own trail. Imagine the life you want to live including hobbies, social activities, career, education, etc. Ask people online, or other people you meet how to achieve your goals and how they achieved something. Without family you have to seek guidance from the outside world and become more self reliant. Eventually you'll stop focusing so much on the past and you'll have the power you to go forward as a survivor. Do not to let the past stop you from moving forward.

Have you tried God? I finally went to God, and have never been happier. My family was unhealthy and influenced by evil. i had done therapy, too. CODA groups are a good place of support.