Families of Prisoners Support Group

Well, I can't say that people in my life don't know...I tell everyone. I feel that the more honest I am about my situation, the easier it is on everyone.

I tell everyone also. I wouldn't have a choice anyway because it was all over the papers and on the news. I tell everyone so that they know the truth about what has happened. I have been very surprised because I have not had anyone be mean to me because of this. You have to handle this in the way that you feel most comfortable. I just think that keeping it hidden may be harder than having it out in the open.

First of all, you don't have an obligation to tell anyone, unless you want to. Second, if you do decide you want to, the decision is up to you as to which people you will entrust with this information. Again, you have no duty, but to him. He is the one you love, and why is that anyone's business but yours if you are an adult. I've told some family members and a few close friends. I don't care to tell anyone else, and I'm not. You should tell the people that are important to you, and whom you think would support you because they love you. The rest don't matter.

I agree with lilacwoman. This is only your business until you choose to make it someone else's. My entire family knows about my hubby and I, and I am usually somewhat open about it. I am careful when it comes to my job but there are co workers of mine that know as well. Once I do tell someone that I trust about it... they usually can't get me to shut up about him. lol. I just always keep it very simple... yes my husband is in prison... he made some mistakes, and I love him and will wait for him. End of story. I have gotten into it with people who have said I am stupid for waiting or something along those lines. And of course they were people who didn't even know my husband personally. I will go out fighting for him, regardless of the situation or atmosphere I am in. That is one thing I know. Sorry to ramble... my point is... if you have someone that you want to tell... sit down and have a conversation with them... it can actually be a big relief. Otherwise, you can come here to talk about it.

im glad that you asked this. i struggle with this as well. the fact that my bf may have an extremely long sentence is what is difficult for me... in how to explain that to others. a lot of people have been asking about him, since they did know at the time that he was in an accident. i've mostly told colleagues that he is healing well. however, i have been completely honest with my family because I needed their support. I have about 4 or 5 closer friends who know the whole deal.. the majority only know part, and some don't know any.. yet. I know that our situation will end up in the papers once the trial begins (small town...) the sad thing is that his mom and dad don't know the truth about everything.. that's kind of tough. thanks for posting this, i'll be looking forward to reading how others have handled their situations.

The people who need to know, or I choose to tell know. That's all that matters. You are not obligated to tell anyone anything you don't want to. But don't keep it all bottled up inside. It's not good for you. You can't protect him from the criticism. But your love and support will get him through. Being on the outside, while there on the inside is really tough. Take it one day at a time. That's what I have been trying to do. Some days are better than others...

Most of the people in my "circle of life" as I call it, already knew what happened with my husband, but there were still plenty of people that needed to know something. I couldn't very well tell them he just disappeared, could I? I just sucked up any foolish pride I had, and explained what happened.My son tells people that his dad is a truck driver(which he was)and that's why you don't see him at school functions, things like that.And thats okay for him. He's only 6 and kids can be cruel.But my feeling is that it's best to be honest when you can. You know that your guy is not a bad person, just a person who made a mistake and is doing what he has to do to take responsibility. keep in touch.

I understand your frustration. When my husband and I were arrested, and my parents made bond for me and I got out, everyone was telling me to divorce him. I ahd to stand up to most of my family and tell them that I wasn't going to live my life for them. It was very hard but I had to do it. I wasn't about to give up on my hubby. Nothing you say will change their minds they will have to get used to the fact aht he isn't going to leave your life. I know its hard and the decision is up to you to tell or not. But i have been there, I know how it feels. If you want to talk message me anytime!

I have 3 kids, and kids talk as you all know, so everyone knows!! We dont hide it, its not a secret and we try to show the kids that they can talk about it whenever they want to. We're using it as an example to show them what happens when you make the wrong choices in life. I've told their teachers too so they are aware in case of behavior issues. Friends and family know, if someone asks where my man is I tell them. I dont care about the looks or whispers if they come. I know that theres only 1 person that is our true Judge and nobody elses opinion matters. Our love is stronger and some people just dont understand. That doesnt matter to me.

Dragonfly, just said what I was going to say, almost to the letter...lol I bonded myself out, but of course they had to bring my purse, so that involved them. Ever since that day, they have felt the need to tell me their thoughts and opinions. Funny thing is that now, if I am going to tell them anything, I start any conversation with, " I am just telling you this so you know, not to hear what you think." It really has been quite effective and they are actually seeing my determination and are starting to be supportive....