Eating Disorders Support Group

WEIGHT AND TRIGGERS MENTIONED.

So, I'm not sure what to do.

I am 21, and have had an ED virtually all my life. My sister is 19 going on 20 in January. When I was 14 and really starting to "visibly" suffer, my sister was triggered by me (and some book she read, so she says- bah) at age 12. She suffered disordered eating for about a year, though was able to put it behind her as she became involved instead with drinking.

Now, the drinking and smoking and partying is behind her, and she an AMAZING musician: http://www.myspace.com/rickyberger

However, I think she has been really having problems dealing with my ED since I've been going to family counselling with her and she stays at my apartment with my husband and me sometimes when she comes down from northern CA where she lives now. She has been talking a lot about weight these days, mostly about how she is fat and needs to lose weight because she is in the public eye with her music. She is FAR from fat, folks- 5'7.5" and something like 130 pounds. She wears a size 2/4, and sometimes even a Gap size 0 (which she whines has gotten too tight for her- actually, they just make her butt look good, if I may say so). Like I told her, she is on the low side of the BMI scale, and is far from being overweight or even chubby. She eats pretty moderately, not much snacking unless she really is just relaxing- most of the time she is GO GO GO with her music and doesn't have time to stop. Her choices while eating out are moderate, and she chooses well. She is a nutritionist's dream.

However, she assures me that she needs to go on her old "cereal diet" where she would only eat cereal to lose weight (bah!)...I flipped out at that. She keeps saying she has the shoulders of a line-backer and flubby arms, and that she has a gut. NOT TRUE. She is also extremely selfconscious about the fact that she has a little extra hair on her...which to me is no big deal, but it is to her since people see her a lot in her typical 40's garb gettup. She has said that she needs to be skinny and that's the only way she looks good for her audience.

What can I do to convince her otherwise? Right now, she's having pizza on the couch, but I don't want her to slip. Today at lunch at Chili's she had a low-calorie chicken sandwich with a few fries...and I literally knew she was going to try to purge in the bathroom. She looked REALLY guilty when I followed her in (mostly cos I had to pee, but also because I was worried). All I want to do is boost her self-esteem, but how can I do that if I can't practise what I preach?
Posted on 10/04/07, 11:10 pm