Depression Support Group

Olivia Depression and divorce make for bad bed fellows even normal ( I use that term lighty ) deal with depression thru a divorce. I know right now you seem to feel like there is no light but it takes time for the heart to heal baby steps toward a brighter day hon it takes baby steps Hope you feel better soon

Are you under a doctor's care?

I can relate to what you are going through. I myself am in the midst of a divorce and am having a difficult time dealing with it all. The divorce itself is a good thing for me but there are still emotions attached to it. Suffering with depression doesn't make it any easier. I know that things will get better with time. I just have to be patient and wait it out.

Yes im under a doctor's care...it just won't go away... I just don't want to keep living if this is going to be my whole life and it seems it is.

So sorry for your pain Olivia. The divorce and bad marriage are still very recent. Like others have said, it does take time to heal and depression is a normal reaction to divorce. It can get better, but you have to take it day by day. Try to focus on what you can do to just get through today not on how to get through your whole life. Could you call someone today to spend time with so you're not alone? What can you do today to feel better that isn't harmful to yourself?

The only good thing about depression is that it is treatable I know we often think this is for ever but it does not have to be, Consult your Doctor it is treatable the down side it there is some trial and error in getting the medication right.

Feeling lonely is one of the biggest challenges even when we have people around we can still feel lonely, Divorce is like an amputation it does not matter who wanted it there is dreadful loss it is kind of like there has been a death we feel and empty hole by the loss.

How can we feel so lonely when there are so many people around us; friends, family and peers yet we can get so lonely.

Another person cannot prevent me from feeling lonely, but my inner emptiness can be satisfied. When I can come to value my own company, and become my own worthwhile companion.

I spend more time with myself than with anyone else. Wouldn’t it make sense to put some energy into making that relationship as fulfilling as possible?

One of my illusions has been that only another person can fill that empty place within me. Example; if only they were with me now, If only they were more attentive now, I wouldn’t be so lonely but I remain lonely even if after these conditions were met.

Feeling alone and lonely increases our fears of inadequacy. In our alienation from others, paranoia grips us. We yearn to feel connected with someone, we need a sense of belonging, every one of us; belonging to the neighborhood; belonging to our team of coworkers; belonging to DS the group we call friends. Knowing that we do belong gives us an inner peace, warmth that comes with security, well being that we belong to something helps eliminate or fears and feelings of emptiness.

We need to be conscious of our judgments of others, be they verbalized in gossip or only held by our silence. These judgments act as a measure of our own self-image. Our security in knowing we belong, that we are one, relieves us of the need to gossip or judge others unfairly. Real closeness will come when I can talk about myself rather than anyone else.

When I stop expecting others to meet all my needs I will search for new ways to enjoy my own friendship. And when I do get lonely, I have the comfort and support from my DS friends, myself, God who never leaves me.

I will work on building a special relationship with myself and hope to discover how un-lonely being alone can be.

Olivia
I guess im a bit diff than some of u. I was HAPPY for my divorce. When i threw his lazy ass out, i threw the so called wedding ring at him (i had just gotten them at xmas 4 yrs after we were married & we were only married less than 5 yrs), he took the tv & vcr. He thought he was hurting us by taking them. Not in the least. My kids & i played LOTS of games, did lots of reading.
I wasnt lonely for him, hell, i sleep on the couch cushions on the floor the last 3 months of our so called marriage.

Big hugs hun
Cathy

isolation is part of depression. A failed marriage doesn't help depression. You are at a particular time and circumstance. You need to take extra steps to process the big changes that have occurred. Make a concerted effort regarding isolation. It is not easy, but you must try. You did something about a bad marriage, now do something about isolation. Have to be committed to handling it all, not just part.

oh olivia, im so sorry for what your going through!!! i know how difficult this is....have you talked to your doctor about meds??? they arent for everyone but they sure saved my life!!! also some sort of support group or therapy could be helpful...it nice to talk to people who are going through divorce too...writing in your journal here is a huge tool to get things out and get other peoples advise/opinions....there is a group here for people going through divorce prehaps that could help....if i were you i would start with a call to your doctor and see if they can help at all....things will get better hun, they really will but you have to fight and take a step towards getting well.....

First things first, make an appt to see a psychiatrist so that you can get the meds you need to help you to clear up this depression fog. If it lifts even a little bit I promise, you will begin to feel differently. I have struggled with depression for so many years and some days I really think that I've overcome it but then it slams me right back down. Mine will never go away completely, it's a chemical imbalance for me. In the meantime, try and reach out to someone, come to the boards, let us help you through this and know that you are not alone. There have been days when I wanted to end it also but then the next day I get a little glimpse of what life could be like without depression. Never give up and know that today is just a very rough day for you and tomorrow can be totally different.