Clinical depression is a state of sadness or melancholia that has advanced to the point of being disruptive to an individual's social functioning and/or activities of daily living....
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I need help
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I have been contemplating whether I should post this because I am scared that people will think that I am just seeking attention. I really hate that some people would say something like that when they do not even know the person, but maybe I am. I need attention because quite honestly if I don't I don't see the point of living. I know I am going to regret posting this in like 30 minutes, but right now I am so scared. Ok, this is my latest journal entry. No need to respond if you don't want to. I am so screwed up that I really do not know what I am doing:
I am going to do something. I have to do something. I have to get rid of this pain somehow. I cannot take this shit anymore. It is pointless in trying to get better. No matter how hard I try there are always going to be people who are going to look down upon me and say that I am weak. They are right: I am weak. My pain is so bad and I am too afraid to tell anyone. I cannot tell any person because I do not want to seem like I am seeking attention. Nothing is working for me anymore. There is no point in me being here anymore. I need help, but not getting it from the people that I thought could help me. I just want to cry, but I cannot. My emotions are dead. I want to die, but I cannot. I want to be gone, yet can't pull my self together to do it. There is so much pain in this world, that I need to get away from it all. I cannot pretend that I am okay anymore; I am not. Posted on 11/25/07, 03:11 pm |
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DONT go anywhere. u dont have 2 pretend ur ok huni - but dont give up. please. we care abowt u. xxx 
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depends what you have in mind...
And DON'T listen to anyone who tells you its wrong to post these things I'd rather take five minutes out of my life to read this than hear about you doing something in isolation we'll all regret.
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I need to cut. I have just started, but I feel addicted to it already. I just want more pain b/c I deserve it.
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We all come to this place for attention... EVERY sigle one of us. So never apologize for that.
As for the rest... We arehere to offer our opinions/advice to help you... you'd never get that unless you asked.
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just stop right now. Please. Take five minutes. Right i know I'm gonna get laid into for this but how deep are the cuts you've made?
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ohhhh god dont. speaking from experience its a horrible habbit 2 break - and u end up feelin worse later xx
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why r u afraid to tell anyone, darlin'? i see you're studying psych...so surely u know that in order to get better...u MUST tell someone. xoxoxo
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I don't have cuts yet. I am so pathetic that I have not even really been able to cut, just more of poking and scratching until it is red. I also punch myself which works better.
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Believe it or not you are not screwed up you are NORMAL. It's o.k. to get depressed sometimes and wonder WHAT we are hear for. But time will let you know WHY you are here. Pain IS gain. Someday you will beable to help someone experiencing the pain you are now get through this as you will get through it.
According to the Suicide Prevention Course I was required to take for my job, the reason people want to end life is to end the pain you currently feel. What you NEED to do is keep going back to the reasons you WANT to Live. The things you want to to the things you want to work towards, the people you want to see again. I KNOW it's easier said than done, really I do, but keep trying to replace the pain with happy things. Pets you love, a family member that you love, the sunny days you love. WHAT do you Like or Love when you do feel good.
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You don't have to pretend, What's going on that you feel this way?
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