Dementia is the progressive decline in cognitive function due to damage or disease in the brain beyond what might be expected from normal aging. Particularly af...
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My best friend is dealing with her mothers dementia. She has no access to a computer and is in a rural area with no resorces. Her mom L is aware that she is having these spells (what they have named them) she is taking arecept and it is helping but.... Just yesterday my friend S lost her mom at Wal-mart shopping. L wondered off and tried to go to the car and was found 45 minutes later in the parking lot. Both of them were very upset and S tried to make it as light as possible. In tears today she wonders if she is doing the right thing and saying the right things. L lives alone and her daughters do what they can to make sure they can be there as often as possible. The big thing at this point is L thinks the kids are there all day and get's upset cause she can't find them or they don't answer her when she calls. The kids are her children and her grandchildren who are all not there. I need information to pass onto S to help her with this. The doctors they go to are an hour away and so far have not been much help with information on how to care or what to do. Would love to hear of resources or information that I could pass on to help. I love these people with all my heart and feel so helpless because I am so far away.
Thanks for listening and for anything you can give me to help with this. M Posted on 05/08/08, 10:05 am |
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Someone else may have the 800 number handy and will post it to you, but if you go to the Alsheimers Association website (.org), they have a number she can call 24/7 for support and advice. Also they can send her a list of support groups in her area (they are all over) and some have activities for the caree, while she would be in the meeting. The Alzheimers Assn can also refer her to other resources to check out. If her Mom is a Senior Citizen she can also check with the Area Agency on Ageing in her area, for resources.
As a friend you could go over and stay with her Mom so she could run needed errands, or get a hair cut, or you could all go out for lunch or to Walmart (with 2 to watch Mom can't get away as easily). Don't wait for her to ask for your help--it gbets easier to just do everything than to think of who else could and then take the time to ask and arrange. Be a little more proactive--"Ji. I'm going to....Sat. morning. You and your Mom wanna come along? There's plenty of room for your stuff and mine in the car, and I hate aklways shopping alone." Just an idea. rocasi 
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When I was dealing with my husband's dementia all by myself I called the Alzheimer's 24/7 hot line a number of times. They got me though many nights when I didn't know how to cope.
Unfortunately, things will get worse. There are caregivers support groups available in some areas.
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sad but true...like LacyMary said...it will only get worse. Your friend is lucky to have you...offer her your support and understanding and be patient. This disease takes a serious toll on the caregivers....I know..I am one too.
Morganfairy*
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I'm trying to reply to all of you for your kindness and help. I am not sure this is how I hope so. Anyhoo, thank you. I am so far away from her I can't help by being there. All I can do is listen over the phone. and search my computer for help. She has no access to one right now. Just wanted to say thank you to you all.
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If she has absolutely no access to help on her own, she needs to get on the phone with the Alzheimer's Association. You can find the number at www.alz.org
In addition they give away a free book. You can have up to 6 copies. If she reads nothing else she needs to see a copy of that book.
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