Codependency Support Group

I wish I knew. I followed the same patterns. Sweet men who needed caring for, because they were addicted to something, someone, or so co dependent they couldnt handle 'life'. I have no clue how to relate to a nice guy as Ive been taking care of others since I was a toddler. I wish I knew. And I wish that I was healthy enough to attract healthy people who are strong enough to reciprocate.

I had the same issue, I was always attracted to people who needed saving, when I found my current bf he was a reformed "bad-boy", he's the sweetest man I've ever known. Since he's been in a bad place before he knows how to handle my recovery-the beautiful thing: he understands codependency and can help me nip it in the bud when it starts to set in because he's been there before. You'll find someone, it just takes time and searching.

I really would like to find the answer to this one! I always find the type of guy that needs something. I consider myself a rescuer, I have been that way since I was a child. Unfortunately, I always end up with people who take advantage of my giving nature. I have tried to date a couple guys who were just "nice guys" and I just wasn't attracted to them at all. I really don't know what the answer is but really would like to find out.

So Grace--let's do this together-I have turned over a new leaf-I am only going to go out with totally stable nice guys-Last night I was talking with one-and ready he was watching-"The Notebook" and no he is not gay--oh my god--lol there he is-sometimes we have to give them a chance I think-a couple dates instead of just rejecting them after the first--let's write a book--lol

hey there, just joined this group and am in same situation for 12 years no less! I have never gone for nice guys although my boyfriend epitomises the very words 'nice guy', he is extremely good to me. He is an only child (big child he is 43 yrs old lol) and his mom died in 2005 aged 81. He drinks quite a bit come the weekends and expects me to clean up the mess. anyway im rambling, i am also dependant on him, no win situation here! Keep up the good search Christy and when you least expect it, bang !, there he will be, with no baggage in tow.....

omg chirsty, i read ur post with great anticipation, and i read down over the others' posts thinking, i will surely find some help here... i desperately need this! but no one seemed to think they had any answers. after all, i guess if we did, we might not be in this group... still, i thank u all the same, for im getting ready 2 date again and want 2 know... HOW THE HECK will i be able to be attracted to the nice, sane guys??? my first question, since u seem 2 have mastered the art of even getting around guys, is, how does a person officially enter the dating world? plz, i hope it is not thru dating services!!! any advice u have, i wud welcome with open arms, for i do not want 2 become old without a man, lol! Hugs, IMA

OK, this is what I suggest--I have met some nice men through friends-and through church, there is a really great church here in Atlanta, very non-denominational, young and lots of really great guys go to it. Look arouns where you live--They have wonderful singles groups. I would suggest maybe something like eHarmony (?) b/c that although a dating site is more than a hook-up site-I have met people who liked it b/c it tends to have more rules. I have a date with a nice guy on Tues.--I am going to stick it out--even if the chemistry is not instaneous-the last guy I dated-is now dating 20-somethings-he is 40 yep-nice (no) lol, and of course, still calls me for conversation-done with that!