Codependency Support Group

Was that here on DS?

Yeah its in the physical and emotional abuse site on ds, the person did another one and then wrote me some messages that I don't know what I am talking about that codependants are dangerous. Just very wierd.

Sounds like ignorance. Everyone has their own opinions I suppose. As long as they aren't in my life - affecting my mental health, who cares what they think.
I think everyone needs a good codependent to lean on now and then :-)

They might have a true point.

I have family members that refuse to treat their codependency and so any time they give help or advice then it is horrible and some times their help is dangerous.

Here on the codependency board then we are working on recovery and so recovery adice or suggestions here are okay as a suggestions.

One does not go to an alcoholic to get help, but it is better to go to the recovering drunks in AA. That too could screw up but it is still a better source.

My own family of origin will not take advice or help from me because I always push healthy boundaries and true feelings and no abuse as I try to stop the dysfunctions.

So they go to each other and feed off of each other's codependency and the mess goes on and on.

People in recovery need to be careful about our self and be careful as to what kind of help or advice we are being given.

I would even say that we codependent people need to be careful and be cautious about the advice we give to our self.

In my younger days the worse advice and the worse help I ever got was that which I gave to my self because I was a codependent idiot.

Thank God for treatment and recovery.

Well said Booky. I couldn't think of how to put it myself.

I don't know if I would term it "dangerous" to accept help from a codependent person, but I can certainly see how codependent people do sometimes try to control other people's lives by helping them or expect a lot more in exchange for that help than is reasonable.

I agree with booky that a recoverying codependent and a codependent in denial are two very different things.

Booky.. that sounds like something I heard...
"The biggest troublemaker in your life, looks back from the mirror every morning."
My therapist has said to me, Co-dependent parents are not the best parents to have. They tend to "cover-up, smooth over and minimize things for children so they never their skills for accepting responsibility and reality are colored. I guess its all relative, someone could say that is dangerous and someone else might thing it is simply being over protective.
I wouldn't worry about it. It's their opinon.

I do believe that it is not an insult to see the problem as being in our self just like the solution and the cure is in our self too.