A "codependent" is loosely defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for other people's struggles.
Codependency advocates claim a codependent ...
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It seems like talking about my "issues" with my doctor makes me feel worse...I was ok until I brought up my issues again!
I also see my therapist tom night. Tonight I saw my psych doc for my bipolar. I know tom night it will be intense since we're getting deep into my childhood issues. I know you have to heal the pain from the past before moving forward, but I hate stirring up all this stuff! All my self defeating attitudes are being revealed and it's making me feel like there is no hope for me. That somehow I have to learn to live without a romantic relationship. It seems like a no win situation and that makes me sad... Posted on 05/19/08, 11:05 pm |
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sepi-hang in there. It does it better. Its like having to have an operation or have wisdom teeth extracted. It hurts like hell and then with everything taken out you will realize that healing has already started. A romantic relationship is not out of the picture, but so much better if you don't have all this hurt and pain in the way. 
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It is a painful process. It really is. But it surely does get better and keeps getting better. And besides, you get to develop a really good relationship with yourself! That's something to look forward to!
/hugs
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Thanks for the replies...I'm just frustrated since I've been working on my recovery for almost 20 years now! and I'm tired of it...Yes I'm better than I was, but I keep finding more issues to deal with! Now it's romantic relationships, how my childhood experiences has left me thirsty for attention and how it's hurting my present...My sadness is now depression...
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I have been working on my recovery for 20 years too and that is a long long time.
We would like it to end, come to a conclusion and move on. Sadness and depression are always fueled by the feeling of powerlessness. So the minute we find some thing to do about it then that is powerful and energizing. No one is depressed when they are working on a solution. Working on the problem is depressing but the solution rocks. So after 20 years it no longer matters about the recovery work because either we got it or we are doing it wrong. So I would suggest that you do as I decided to do myself and go out and look for romantic love - and expect to find it - and give it your best shot. The solutions are always the same in the end - just do it.
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Therapy is not supposed to be easy. it is Hard work but in the end it is well worth it. My therapist once told me, if it wasn't hard it isn't therapy - It's coaching.
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Thanks Brooky. I probably sit tight and not go after the relationship. I've sought it out for the last 7 years and have been in&out of relationship with unavailable men. It's sad to say this but I've sort of hit bottom in this area. Maybe when I feel more confident and after the wounds heal from this last stab I'll become hopeful again.
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