A "codependent" is loosely defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for other people's struggles.
Codependency advocates claim a codependent ...
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My husband just made a new friend that is female and I am very jealous and upset and it is causing me to feel very bad about the whole sitution. Is this part of co-dependancy? I am still learning exactly what co-dependancy is. and how do I deal with this situation? Your advice is greatly appreciated.
Posted on 04/30/08, 11:04 am |
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maybe you feel threatened by the role this female friend will take in your husband's life? Codependent or not, I think it is natural to feel a sense of "mine" when it comes to our spouse.
this example, in itself, I don't think is codependency. If he is or becomes abusive and you stay b/c you NEED him, that starts to become more along the lines of codependency. 
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but are my actions because I don't want him to be her friend with my control issues?
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My rule is you can be married to me or you can have female friends, but not both. It is inappropriate for a married person to be in a private situation with a person of the opposite sex. Sorry, old school here.
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I don't think it is right for a married man to have a female friend or vice versa. it's to easy to develop an attraction. I think your jealousy is very natural.
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I myself would not except it. There is too much of a chance that he may end up in a physical relationship with her. I have seen it happen too many times. I would tell him it is either you or the friend and if he doesnt like it and doesnt want to choose I would leave him. That is just me. You have a right to feel jealous since it could turn into more than just friendship.
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Most of us have friends of the opposite sex. I have friends from as far back as grade school, I shouldn't have to give up those friendships if I'm in a relationship. When we start making assumptions that a friendship is going to turn into more, it is time to take inventory of ourselves and find out why we feel this way, chances are there are some things going on in ourselves and our relationship that are causing the feelings of jealousy and anger that need to be addressed. I agree that this is a sensitive subject, I hope you are able to work this out with your husband and the two of you are able to talk through it.
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he told me that he ended there phone conversations due to the fact that he was starting to have feelings for her not just friendship feelings.
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i think it is a normal response to feel jealous and upset when your husband told you he started to have romantic feelings for a friend.
red flags ain't party favors. that said, perhaps he is trying to manipulate you in some way? to provoke a response out of you (anger? jealousy? more attention?) i should think that few men who cheat or have feelings for other women then announce it to their wives....... seems there is something deeper he is trying to tell you..... ((((((hugs)))))))
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I don't know I need an outsider's view. I LOVE my boyfriend, and all I want to do is make him happy. He's ended things …
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Im soo uneducated about this codependancy thing..even though I would consider myself an educated woman. I was in an …
