A "codependent" is loosely defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for other people's struggles.
Codependency advocates claim a codependent ...
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LG 3/19
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Sorry about bumping all the previous meditations up last night, y'all.....I was trying to help a friend.
Here's the meditation for today: Staying Out of the Middle March 19 "I don't want to get in the middle, but..." is a sign that we may have just stepped into the middle. We do not have to get caught in the middle of other people's issues, problems, or communication. We can let others take responsibility for themselves in their relationships. We can let them work out their issues with each other. Being a peacemaker does not mean we get in the middle. We are bearers of peace by staying peaceful ourselves and not harboring turmoil. We are peacemakers by not causing the extra chaos created when we get in the middle of other people's affairs and relationships. Don't get in the middle unless you want to be there. Today, I will refuse to accept any invitation to jump in the middle of others' affairs, issues, and relationships. I will trust others to work out their own affairs, including the ideas and feelings they want to communicate to each other. ________________________________________ My thoughts on this: The first thing that comes to mind, is the confusion I'm experiencing right now, about what is my business, and what is my husband's business in our marriage. I want to be a peacemaker in my home, as well as everywhere else I go, and just don't know how to do it in my marriage. I think that's probably the hardest place to start. I feel it has to be the first place for me to start, though. It seems the more I try to do the right thing, the more resistant he is to my attempts to bring harmony between us. I'm faithful that things will get better as I continue to work my program to the best of my ability. Posted on 03/19/08, 03:03 am |
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Ahhh it is sooo true. I have just started getting to where I do not jump in the middle so much! I try to just listen and if asked make non-commital commentary about things like "Oh that's an interesting way to look at it." or something. It is something that is working well for me. I'm getting some positive responses when I let people solve their own problems so it feels good and reinforces the behavior for me. As my hubby says, "Don't try so hard. Just be you." 
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I just faced this last saturday. So good to read this, very helpful.
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I used to be a peacekeeper. Or I should say, I tried to be a peacekeeper. That codependent thing didn't work!
I strive to do peacemaker.
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