A "codependent" is loosely defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for other people's struggles.
Codependency advocates claim a codependent ...
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Maybe I am going crazy
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I have just found this group tonight and it seems wonderful.I am so exhausted from being walked on and taking care of people. The sickest part is that I think it is part of my own self worth and identity. I can remember being so miserable with myself as a teenager and actually "changing" myself to fit in better with my friends and family. I have no idea who or what I am as a person anymore. I am never happy, drink too much and always, always feel as if my life is wasting away. All of my life I have "faked" cheerfulness even though I was not feeling that way. Even when I am drunk, I constantly plan on ways to help other people. I am a divorced mother of four children and am now in another bad relationship with a man that I am supposed to marry. Its exactly the same issues that cropped up in my marriage. Isn't this codepency? I want to get help, but don't know where to start.
Thanks to everyone for sharing your thoughts and experiences....it helps! Posted on 01/01/08, 10:01 pm |
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it is possible that you are experiencing the same relationship over and over because of codependency. If your ready to change yourself I'm sure you will find lots of support here...welcome. I would recommend the book codependency no more to start. 
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At first, it always feels like you're going crazy, but that is by design. It's actually the thinking that surrounds you which is crazy!
Say to yourself: My situation is a result of accepting nonsense as fact. I see the difference, and I know what I know. ;o) every woman is encoded with three great powers! Her KNOWING, her CREATIVITY, and her LOVING. Use your strengths in the service of your vision... (Audre Lourde)
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Welcome! I can relate to putting on a happy face even when you don't feel that way, and I've grappled with depression my entire life. For me, hobbies that show me that I have a helluva lot of talents and skills, and self-pleasuring or masturbation for sex have been the greatest gifts toward my own "self-actualization". I don't really need anyone at this point, although it'd be nice to wake up to a warm body in the morning next to mine...Hope this helps!
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I don't think there is a "right answer" about where to start. There's this book that mgs1 recommends, it's called "How to be an Adult" -- it has really helped me generally speaking with assertiveness and dealing with my fears, anger, and guilt.
It can also help to sit down and write down your boundaries, or atleast determine what your basic boundaries are. Just as a start.
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OK here's the deal..... My hubby got advice from some blog on DS that suggest Most women use codepency has an excuse or …
I stumbled across this website last night while google-ing codepency, and it touched a nerve. I didn't know if I …
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