A "codependent" is loosely defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for other people's struggles.
Codependency advocates claim a codependent ...
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Why do I feel like Im going to die?
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Im new to this site, this is my first time doing anything like this. I am in a relationship with an alcoholic that is very emotionally abusive. When we argue and he leaves I feel like Im going to die, I have panic attacks, anxiety, anger, rage, depression and a whole range of emotions. Why do I feel like this? I know that I would be better off if he would stay gone and we parted. I know all the logical answers, why do I feel so frantic? I find myself driving around looking for him, crying and cursing. I actually feel like I am in physical pain, like im going to die! I really want to end this relationship, but feeling this way is making it impossible. Any advice or insights?
Posted on 07/24/08, 10:07 pm |
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sweetheartface, your profile says you are a recovering addict yourself - are you working a program? I ask because I truly believe that the 12 steps help us when we surrender ourselves to them. I know exactly how you are feeling right now. When my husband was drinking (he was a binger) and he'd be gone for days, I would literally go crazy, I couldn't think, eat, sleep, work...When he was home, it was the same thing, just waiting for the next binge to happen. I cried, I screamed, I threatened, I did it all. I hated him and I grew to depise who I had become. Like you, the logical answer was right there, yet I remained. Alanon gave me what I needed to find myself again and if it weren't for my program, I'd still be right there. Please remember, you can't fix him, you can only choose to fix you. ((hugs)) I know it's hard, but you are worth it. 
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Rainygirl pretty much hit it on the head..Do find an Alanon meeting it can only help..
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leave.... know one thing. he will probably never change, and yoou are the one who will get sick.....
i have recently gone back to aa, but my boyfriend is still out there...i went to a meeting yesterday...and when i told him he was so angry.... and drunk besides this..... i also dont know how to break away.. it feels as if my heart and stomach are going with him.... that is my sign that i MUST leave. good luck to you...and if you need to talk... just contact me.
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I think you are going through withdrawal. It is possible to be addicted to someone and it sounds like you are. Alanon would help, AA would help, and therapy. Good Luck. Please help yourself and stop worrying about him... He will do what he is going to do.
God Bless.
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Hey girl,
I don't know why, but I am exactly the same way. My husband does something outrageous, I say that's it I have had enough you need to leave. As soon as it seems like he is going to leave I panic, I need to hold him, I want everything to be alright again, I don't want to be without him and on and on. I feel sick, I cry my eyes out, all of it. He has gone to stay with his mom at my request and I am starting to calm down and enjoy the peace of being home by myself. I just needed to get over that first day or two when all I want is to be close to him, to find the answer for him, to fix him. Sorry I don't have any advice - I have no idea what to do about this, but I do understand and send you prayers. Peace out,
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