Breakups & Divorce Support Group

http://dailystrength.org/people/17...

I think that's a link to my latest journal entry. If not you can get to it via my profile. Normally I keep them all private but I did not want to post a massive post about my current situation. If you want to read it, read it.

It involves my unwell STBX being back in my home, though not, I repeat, NOT back with me as a couple. It's a huge hairy dilemma. An 800 lb. gorilla of a dilemma. A moral dilemma, a practical dilemma, a pros and cons dilemma, a short-term vs. long-term interests dilemma. Am I making a fresh mistake? Or am I saving myself some dire future costs by enduring a momentary hiccup? Both could be true, I suppose.

I must say that my stress level is way down, I mean, way down. That can be attributable to a stalemate of epic proportions being at an end, but it could also be true because I am like an addict relaxing into a fix. I'm not kidding myself here. Yes, a supremely frustrating and needless emotional standoff has been overcome, but it also means that I have to actually learn to be a divorcing person under a new guise of civility and cooperation, which in some ways is harder than divorcing with enmity. My STBX is right there again, but he is not husband, not father, not 'hon,' which I have used conversationally about 10 times in the last couple days out of sheer habit. The outlaw situation we've been living for 3 months is suddenly concluded, but that does not mean it did not happen. Nothing has really changed except the situational veneer. Gotta find a way to achieve divorce, regardless. Crashing waves or glassy calm, we're still adrift . . .
Posted on 04/04/08, 12:04 pm