Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Find a good reliable counselor or therapist. Mine has helped me so much to keep things in perspective.

I was thinking of coping it down in note pad and pulling it up and posting it as needed...

DS has been wonderful!! Most of the people I've encountered here have been very supportive and NOT JUDGEMENTAL!

One of the most important things I've realized is that, hard as it may be, you need to stop asking why. That doesn't matter and it's not going to bring him/her back. You just need to reach deep, deep inside yourself to find some acceptance of the situation. You will not be able to move on until you realize it's over. "Why" honestly does not matter. Okay, let me amend that- if you're an abusive sick f*ck then maybe "why" matters. You might need to think about changing some of your behaviors! In general though I'd say you've just got to let it go and not question it. :)

You will hear this over and over and OVER again but time heals. You'll get there. There is no magic formula of when, but it will happen. I do believe that you have to be proactive in your recovery though. You can wallow in your pity and NEVER get over the break-up or you can grieve and then make a conscious effort to heal and move on. I personally don't want to still be whining and crying over him a year or two from now. Trust me that I have earned the right to DO that (read my profile!) if I want but I don't want to live my life that way. The choice is yours too. As much as I love the song "He stopped loving her today" by George Jones I do not want it to be the story of MY life!

And of course God, your family and your friends are awesome at helping you through this!

Good luck!

I think you need to post it where everybody can read it when ever they need to. Can things be posted in the news & info like this?

Excersing helps but for me my concentration level was so low that a gymn was out of the question.

What I did to exercise is walk a lot. Since I wasn't working I sometimes took very long walks--- 3 to 4 hours. I would explore the neighborhoods, look at people's garden and if someone was outside I would strike up a conversation and make comments on their garden. Sometime I'd ask questions about their flower and plants.

Walking does a number of things... it gets you outside in the sunlight --- a good way to get your vitamin D and get those serotonin levels up.

Also, walking creates energy and your blood is going through your entire body in good ways... especially blood to your brain.

I found my walks very enjoyable.

One day I even remember walking to find all the churches in my neighborhood and then I would go inside to find out what their services.

It was fun and didn't take a whole lot of concentration.

Often at the end of those walks I was so pooped out that when it was time to sleep ... I slept like a baby.

Applying the "NO Contact" rule helps in healing. (Or TRY as little contact as possible if there are children involved. Leave YOUR emotions out of it.) Take your power back!

Yes, definitely DS is a wonderful support group. Make friends on this forum and support other members making you feel like you are being helpful towards others.

I have another

Be kind to yourself

For a minute there I thought this was a continuation of he not getting any thread.

For all you ladies out there... go out and buy yourself a bob( batter operated boyfriend aka vibrator) you are gonna need it..

Men get aquainted with your hands again...

Find out what safe sex is all about and dont settle


If you need to sleep and cant' take gravol..safe for a few days and you can buy without a prescription.

There are two kinds of divorce lawyers out there- mediation type lawyers and litigation type... find out what kind you will need ( trust me on this one)