Breakups & Divorce Support Group

My sister just sent this to me:

Dear wife:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever.
I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you
quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home
& didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal
& even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, &
went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell
me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us
as husband & wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me
anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Husband,
P.S. don't try to find me, your SISTER & I are moving away to West
Virginia together. Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true you &
I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from
what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your
constant whining & griping. Too bad that doesn't work. I DID notice
when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing that came to mind
was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me not to say
anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when
you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY
SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk
boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on
them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed
$50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt
we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I
quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica , but when I got home
you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you
have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the
letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. so take care.
Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free at last!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born
Carl. I hope that's not a problem
Posted on 07/07/08, 03:07 pm