Bipolar disorder (previously known as manic depression) is a diagnostic category describing a class of mood disorders where the person experiences states or episodes of depression ...
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hi everyone, i'm in a bad way. i've recently weaned off effexor and gradually been put on cymbalta (low dose 20 mgs) - been on it for about 10 days. i teach highschool and i have found out that i am up for lay off, although many say that after bidding i will have my job back. on top of taking full time grad classes for my masters, a new house, and BP1...i'm a mess. i cant stop crying or getting sooo pissed off at the drop of a that that i am irrationally angry - so much so that it makes me mean and i'm actually annoying myself. my fiance is a big help and so understanding, but i even feel guilt for my behavior and him having to "deal" with me like this. he assures me things will get better, but they feel like they never will. he tells me that i need to learn to just let it go...but with BP1 and OCD, i dont think he'll ever understand that its not for lack of learning.
any advice or support would be appreciated...i guess i want to know if this is just a BP depression meltdown or the meds? thanks Posted on 05/11/08, 11:05 am |
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bump please 
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It sounds like you are worried about everything at the moment.
The only thing that may help at the moment is distraction. Either a hobby such as gardening or swimming or going to the gym. Do something physical which keeps your mind active. You can't do anything about what is happening at work. But you have your study to keep you busy. Do something nice, which doesn't cost you anything. Walk in the park. Stay away from shopping. Good luck MJ
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Sounds like you have a lot on your plate and you are trying to eat it all at once. I do the same thing. your meds should start taking edge off, but I would call you pdoc and see what they say, cymbalta may not be the drug for you.
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I don't usually contribute here, but, I saw your post.... and thought I'd swing a few observations your way.
Ummm... first off, you aren't going crazy! Bp's have VERY high standards... and you feel inadequate if you can't meet them. Deal with it. If you've tried your best, then, that's all you can do! DON'T beat yourself up over it. You have waaaayyyy too many things on your plate! You've (basically) reached "sensory overload". You're experiencing the "flight or fight" perception of life. STOP IT! Concentrate on ONE thing... and try to correct it. DO NOT try to tackle everything at once. You'll be doomed. Sit back and don't dwell on what you DON'T have... and concentrate on what you DO have! That's the starting point. Next, tear down the walls that surround you. (YOU built them!) Let your fiance' contribute more. Ask questions! Provide answers! Make sure he understands BP... to the fullest extent! THAT will ease some pressure. If I were you, I'd become a mindless robot, at work... and conserve my energy. That energy I would direct towards my Masters! (It has a higher priority) Above all... DON'T GIVE UP! The BP world is FLAT... and you're (dangerously) close to the EDGE! HANG IN! It'll get better! Hugs! Keith
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If you've just weaned off effexor then you're probably still carrying stress from that. But to me your reaction to what's happening with your job and concerns about the future is
a very normal level of stress. Try to calm your life down and keep away from stress. It's nice that your fiance is trying to be supportive but he might only be "trying" by saying things like "learn to let go". Be gentle with him and take care of yourself.
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Waaay too much on your plate.
1) The job will take care of itself as they said. God always comes through. Always. 2) The house will survive, let it be. 3) Distract yourself. There is nothing at all you can go about the job so why worry? Grad school is grad school, study, do the papers, take the tests, they stop worrying. All you can do is all you can do. 4) You will make it through this. Times like this are tough but BP1s are really really tough people. You just don't have to stress about things that are not right now in your control.
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bump, thank you everyone
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how long off effexor? I was wrecked for months with withdrawals. It's kinda notorious for that (with beepers)
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Coming off Effexor was a nightmare..sick like a street addict for a long time.
But you have a lot going on..prioritise and take it easier..or you just might have a major episode on your hands soon. Take care
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