Bereavement Support Group

I think it is normal at least to a degree, you dont want to remember all the bad things, so you concentrate on all the good things. I know when i even begin to look at other men it dont work, i am contantly comparing them to dj and they dont measure up and he was far from perfect. take care

Yes, I think this is normal. Hugs 2 U. Xx

your right but would you want to remember the bad times as if they overuled the good thats why you feel like that cos no matter what bad times there were the good usually overide the bad nobody is perfect though

I know that my Daddy wasn't perfect as no-one is here on this earth, but I can honestly say this... He was as close to perfect that I have ever known.I guess you could say I am putting him on a pedastal, he wouldn't want me too though and the reason I know this is because while he was still here I felt this same way, I was very Blessed to have a Daddy like mine.

I think that we all do this, remembering how precious life really is, and knowing how soon it is all gone. My family, still talks about some of the things that used to exasperate us about certain loved ones, but we do it with not criticism but humore. Like my step-dad who just passed away. He could really aggravate my sister, mom and I to no end, but you COULD NOT stay mad at him! That in it'self was exasperating at times, but funny.
Forgiveness for past pain is sadly, much easier to give when it's too late to tell the person yourself. I'm glad that you are only remembering the good things, it means to me, that your love for that person was genuine, and could break through any hardship that you may have suffered. Huggs, Rainbow

Yes, it is. I did that when my mom and dad died. I read a book about this topic; if we remembered all the bad at first too, we wouldn't grieve as much. Something like "I miss you far more than I loved you." Not meant as a put down of the one we lost, it's just true. In time we remember them as they really were, flawed human beings like the rest of us. I had my dad on a pedestal for a long time. In the end though, I loved them both very much and still miss them.