Alcoholism Support Group

If you are an alcoholic I would concentrate on how you are going to solve your alcohol problem.

Do you want to stop drinking? Can you do it on your own willpower or do you need help?

If you are an alcoholic you will never be able to have a healthy relationship whilst you are still drinking - that is my experience anyway.

Your relationship may be causing you some bad feelings but alcoholism can kill you.

In 30 years of drinking I can't recall a single problem that drinking ever solved and I don't think it will help this one so stay away from the bottle. Also, I've been a guy all my life and we don't have any codes, we just sometimes say stupid things that can get us messed up. Try to let it go and not make too much of it.

Drinking certainly didn't change the outcome one way or the other, so IF you have a problem with alcohol, now is the time to do something about it before it really DOES cause this relationship to end. Most of US really DID drink because we were scared of life and didn't know how to live it day to day. We were great in a crisis, but not day to day living.

If you need help with your drinking, you might want to call AA. Just a suggestion. Good luck. Lee

Being afraid willnot help your situation and the wine will certainly make it worse. You got to relax and enjoy the moment. You can't live in fear for the rest of your life.

Just remember alcohol will not solve any of your problems.....it will only make them worse in the end....keep talking it out with him...tell him about your insecurities and see what he says.....you just have to remember drinking will only make things worse....you have to keep focused on you and your future, no matter what happens in this relationship.....love yourself first!!
Dont give up just because you had one drink either, its minor if you dont pick up the next day....refocus your life on you, how strong you are and how for you have come...
And dont freak out so soon over your bf...men do say dumb stuff.....just try to keep the communication open with him and let him know how you feel
I wish the best for you and if you need to talk I am here
Ashley

I usually don't encourage people to work a "selfish program" but until you have some solid recovery under your belt it might not be such a bad idea in your case.

For me, I see fear as a character challenge. My fourth step was full of tons of fears. Today I pray for God to remove my fears and replace them with faith in my higher power.

Step work is a good way to address fears. Good luck.

Maybe you are obsessing about your relationship for no reason at all. What's most important is concentrating on your emotional esteem, your sobriety & your happiness. Please don't let your boyfriend define who you are as an individual.

The alcohol will only bring on more paranoia & confusion.

I wish you the very best hon! :)

Please stop drinking now. It could have been an innocent question. Take it as a compliment, that he'd want to remain friends. To me it means he likes as a lover and a friend now.

Good luck and god bless.

Hello gayleh.

Mark Twain (Samuel Clements.) said. “I am an old man and have known many troubles but most of them never happened.) And I have used this a lot when I would project into the future.

I remember the the times when I would say to myself I wonder what would happen if this was to happen or that was to happen and the fear it brought and I would make myself sick with worry and then it didn't happen something entirely different happened.

So when I came into recovery I learn't I am powerless over what may happen in the next two hours let alone the future and worrying about it is just wasted energy.

But what I could do was take care of the now and not to listen to this head of mine it will tell me anything.

Or not to listen to the first thought the one that says my boyfriend wants to break up. But the second thought that says well he's the one that is going to miss out because I have so much to offer.

I am definitely starting to rave on aren't I .

If you have a drinking problem then putting more fuel on to the fire is not going to put it out. It will only get worse so take care of that first your drinking.

Talk to your friend let him know what you are feeling . Embrace your fear that way it has no power over you. Besides fear is false evidence appearing real.

I better stop hear but if you have any questions about alcoholism I would only be to happy to help.

God Bless...

Lionel