Parenting Big Kids (5-8) Support Group

Well said Renee :)

For parents who believe that spanking is the right thing to do, read this link about what children think http://www.endcorporalpunishment.o...

(Spanking is called smacking in the UK.)

To call a parent who swats their child on the bottom a "violence apologist" and to compare them to abusive spouses is taking it a bit far. I have not seen anyone here advocate any violence against children-there are just differing views on how everyone raises their children. The thing that is unfair is when my son-who is loving, well balanced, well behaved and respectful-cannot learn at school because the teachers are too busy dealing with behavior problems-aka children who are not effectively disciplined at home-by any means. Maybe I am older than everyone else on here-I am 35-but when I went to school, we didn't have the behavior issues that schools deal with today-because we knew that our parents would deal with us when we got home. These same children that disrupt school today will very likely be the ones that make true "victims" of everyone in 10-15 years. Parents should be their children's teacher, guide and stop trying to be their friends-the time for that is when they are grown up. If parents don't start taking their roles seriously then the world will only get worse. Children are children-not mini adults-they should be being raised by loving, firm parents. Yes children have rights too and part of my job as a parent is too protect my son's rights. His rights are violated daily when he goes to school with children who have never known discipline and many have never known love. The far greater travesty here is that many children today are just growing up-not being raised-and then they are expected to abide by rules and laws in society and they don't have a clue how to-then they get in trouble and many have the consequence of going to prison. What is more of a violation of a child's rights than not being able to lead a productive life when they are adults? Or not knowing right from wrong? However parents choose to discipline their children is up to them, but like I said before, time outs and taking away was not cutting it for me and my husband. Our son was being disrespectful and trying to run all over us. Like I also already said, it doesn't take more than the threat of a spanking to see a behavior change in my son. He knows right from wrong and understands that there are consequences for his actions. Many people think that spanking is wrong-guess what, that is an opinion-just like I have an opinion that I resent parents who don't make sure that their children behave. We all have them and I know that I am in the minority in defending spanking, but I am also in the minority of having a child that says yes sir and no sir and is well behaved and is respectful. I think that I will stay right where I am at in my minority!

I am older than you and I was still at school when it was acceptable for children to be caned or had the slipper - these children continued to behave in an disruptive way.

My children are at school with children who are spanked, they are generally the ones who are disruptive.

My children have never been spanked, they behave impeccably at school, they respect their teachers and their elders.

I was not spanked (my mum was and didn't agree with doing it to me) and I grew up with respect, knowing right from wrong and was never disruptive at school.

I had my privileges taken away and that worked so well with me, I still remember the times I didn't get my favourite magazine because I hadn't behaved well.

Yep I agree, children are not mini-adults, but they are still people and deserve respect, and I don't think respect comes by spanking.

It is not an opinion, it is a way of parenting. A way of parenting that has different views.

I think there is something that some of you are missing. If you re-read everyone's replies, we are not tlaking about multiple times a day spankings. I could probably count on two hands the number of times I have had to resort to spanking with both my children. That would be 5 times each and they are 8 and 5. I think also what Mickey is saying that only after the time-outs and taking things away is not working do we resort to a spanking.

i think spanking is fine. I lived through it and turned out fine and so will our kids

I beleive in spanking and my children have wonderful manners and are very well behaved.

thanks lant

I, and others, are aware that you are not talking repeated spanking - that would be child abuse.

I would never, not even once, raise my hand to my children, just not part of the kind of parent I am.

Can I ask those who spank how they feel if another family member (ie a grandparent) spanks their child or if teachers were still allowed to cane (spank) children.

Just curious as to how far the discipline stretches inside and outside the family.

this is pathetic. This is the reason children have such a lack of respect in school and at home. children have more rights now then they ever had and we have seen a rise in pregnancy as well as violence in schools and drug abuse. when i was a child you knew your place. now we have our children so confused that they don't understand how they should behave. I don't think beating a child is the answer but when a child KNOWS there are consequences to their actionsd they think twice before making a bad choice. Like many of you I can count on one hand how many times i have spanked all three of my children. I have taught for nine years and i see a pattern every year. Parents who are weak in the area of discipline suffer because their children make many poor choices. It also never matters if they come from a single family home. parents need to set up boundries and consequences.