Parenting Teenagers (12-18) Support Group

That's basically how I've handled it. It doesn't leave room for argument or explaining his way out of it. He's just caught and it's clear it won't be tolerated. Later on, when the smoke clears, maybe the next day or next time you have him "trapped" in the car with you = ) you can have a conversation with him about why it's not acceptable... in basic, neutral terms (no blaming, yelling, embarrassing him, etc., just explaining that while it's normal to be interested, tempted, and all that, you have objections to it...and of course, tell him what they are = )

Teenagers and all children are naturally curious about sexuality. Unfortunately instead of looking at "dirty" magazines like we may have as kids, children now have the internet to use. I would definitely have a talk with him to let him know that his curiousity is normal but the behavior of using the internet is unacceptable not only because of the number of child predators out there but the malicious software that gets installed on your pc without your knowledge and then turns your pc into a "zombie" machine that is essentially controlled by a third party to be used at his or her will. There can be a violation of privacy of any and all information housed on the pc including credit card numbers, bank info, passwords etc that may have been typed into the pc. You don't need to install a bunch of crazy software. Alot of ISP's are providing free McAfee software that can be downloaded now and you can adjust security settings through that, your router or through your Windows software. There are instructions to do this at: http://windowshelp.microsoft.com/W...

I'm sure all will work out for you and that your boy is just being normal. He just needs to be told that he is normal and hear the ground rules from you and your husband as well as the consequences. Let him know that you can and will track his internet usage, pages visited, etc until trust is re-established again.

I don't think computers should be in the child's room. Too much opportunity to get in trouble. My computer is in a common area of the home which is open for everyone passing through to see. Which includes anything I'm doing on the computer. I don't believe in the saying "boys will be boys". It's up to the parents to guide them and lead by example.

Boys will be boys.
Hopefully he was looking at women and not men.
Keep the computer in the living room. Then he will have to go to his buddies house to look at it.

We caught our son, he was horrified. We back tracked to see exackly what he saw and how long it was going on, and then told him that we'd seen it all. Then we reminded him that we can check the computer any time. We didn't get mad, we treated it like a curiousity, but We talked about who those women moght be, and how they may have got to that point. We also told him that there are men that are addicted to porn sites and can't have relationships with real women because of it.

It was a bit sweet he started with goggling "naked art".

You have to love them no matter what!