Parenting 'Tweens (9-12) Support Group

Sorry about your losses.

I agree that we all too often say 'later' or 'in a minute' or 'in a wee while' when we don't mean it or just cant be bothered listening.

I'm trying to get into the habit of stopping an listening for a change.

THNX 4 ur reply, I really...need 2 work on tht still. :)

I think most of us do. Thanks for posting this.

I do try to listen to my two, I grew up with a Mentally Ill mother who would often put herself before me, I often felt unwanted and in the way.

This experience has made me the person I am today, what my children say is very important to me, they may be children but they still have plenty to say.

I have done this too many times lately. I have chronic migraines everyday and in severe pain from them. I am miserable. I am a single mom working a full time job with 2 children. It is tough and when they first started I often found myself saying "not now", "I don't feel good, maybe later" and so on. I missed playing and talking to them but the pain was so bad. I adapted to the pain because I had no choice. Occassionally I get down and don't want any noise and all. I have felt very sadden by being sick because I know that in the 2 years of having chronic migraines I have already missed a lot and I know that my kids miss me too. I do make an effort to listen and spend quality time with them because the quantity time is so limited. Anyhow, yes I understand what you are saying.

I realized that I do the same thing. It's good to know I'm not the only one. Thanks for sharing

Wow. Thanks for sharing your story, JT. You are so strong!

What an inspiring post. I am going to listen to my son today. You've reminded me that when I take the time to open my heart and really listen to him, he always responds so well.

I think it's difficult because he's so moody. He might be moody because I don't listen enough. You've helped me see the vicious cycle. Thanks!

Still having a hard time listening... I sort of tune ppl out...sad, I space out a lot...Could it b depression?? I feel happy :) I think I'm still in shock for seeing my child die in my arms, twice.

: / ??

I think it's impossible to listen ALL the time. We are human and being fully engaged every time your child speaks is impossible.

I'm trying to listen when I know he's really in need. Yesterday he came back from a bike ride and was so angry from an argument with a friend. He didn't know what to do with all his feelings. I knew it was most likely his fault and normally I'd say that. But this time I listened. I let him talk about his friend. I let him vent. Afterwards, when he was calm, I was able to give some advice on how to avoid a future similar situation. I had to interrupt something I was engrossed in and spend some time listening without lecturing.

It worked!

Another thing I'm doing with him is at bedtime, he has to tell me five things he's thankful for that day. This helps me get to know him better.

Awesome...I will try that 2 !!! :)