Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurologic syndrome that exhibits symptoms such as hyperactivity, forgetfulness, mood shifts, poor impulse control, and distrac...
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Parent in Desperate need of help!
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I need help. I have a 6 year old that is failing first grade. He can not concentrate and complete in class assignments. He has had some discipline and behavioral problems for the past year but I have remained adamant about not medicating him until he was followed by a doctor/psychologist for a while to confirm that they felt the medication would be helpful. I am lost and the School is "Suggesting" Meds in the little subtle way that that the public school system pushes on parents every day. The counselor and the Pediatrician last year both were leaning towards a diagnosis of Oppositional Defiant Disorder. The new counselor feels he has an adjustment disorder.
It has been suggested that I put him on medication for a short period of time as a "rescue Drug" but I have no Idea where to begin. I do not want to give him medications that will cause worse side effects. I was told that ADD/ADHD medication would help calm him down and allow him to focus. He has a ton of anxiety. Most people that have met him and have observed his behavior felt that he is unable to focus and concentrate. The school has said that he "exactly mimics" the behaviors of their ADD kids before medication. PLEASE TELL ME WHAT TO DO. I do not want to b forced into medicating my child.... but I also do not want him to fail 1st grade. I have been trying so hard to help him. Some nights we are up till 8:30 as it takes hours and hours just to complete homework. I am exhausted and overwhelmed. I felt what better place to turn for advice is the mom's in your group. Thanks so much if you will e-mail me some ideas,etc. Posted on 02/08/08, 10:02 am |
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Sorry. I might should have put this in the Advice section. I am a newbie :) 
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I understand wanting to be careful about medication for sure. But you know, I don't think it's just about school. I bet that your little man hates feeling out of control and flighty. I hate the fact that I cannot focus. It's actually been a terrible strain on my family. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I read the book, "Driven to Distraction" and it was really helpful for me. I think that you sound like an exceptional mother. You are so lovingly trying to get him the help he needs. It's so good that you are trying to be informed. A child who has ADD/ADHD and never knows, grows into an adult with serious self esteem issues. It makes a person feel lazy, stupid, out of control. I would suggest that you take him to an actual psychiatrist and get him evaluated. That's what I did. I know about being overwhelmed. I have a 13yr old (who is home-schooled), a 3yr old and a 2yr old. They are all girls. And I have ADD. I am there with you and for you. You just hang in there and continue to research. You will find answers. I called around an interviewed psychiatrists over the phone and found one that I sort of clicked with. I know you are overwhelmed, but you doing exactly what a good mom does - trying to help your child. You'll make it through.
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Thank-you. I am very overwhelmed right now. my mom begins Chemo next week and yesterday (as I am right now) I broke down crying at the school. They probably think I was crazy but this is just a hard position to be in. I hate to feel forced into putting something into his body and the fear of finding out later that the medication harmed him in some way. I want him to be well and happy. Last year he said he couldn't stop crying. There has been some other indication of uncontrollable behavior. He went for over 6 months without smiling ! And he is 6 years old. It breaks my heart and I just want what is best for him.
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I definitely think you should work fast to get him on some medication. I know that you are scared, but he needs help. His quality of life could be so much better. And you know, the first med he is on may not be the right one. With these kinds of meds, it's a little bit of trial and error. But he is very lucky to have a mom that cares so much about him. Many parents wouldn't be trying this hard. You are wonderful mom for that! I hope everything goes okay with your mom.
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My son was the same way, his behavior was very noticeable in first grade. His train of thought went 90 miles an hour that he could not slow down to understand the teacher. Sometimes he would hide under his desk from anxiety. So he is on Zoloft (lowest dose) and it has been a God-send. His behavior has improved tremendously. Homework is so much easier and everyone is happy!!
Give meds a try, if you don't see improvement, you can always stop. But I think you owe it to him and his education. I mean that in a nice way. I don't regret us doing it. It was a major improvement and he feels better about himself (he is now in the 6th grade!). I hope this helps! Remeber, you will still be the one in control of it all! :0)
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To iluv-- question -- you mention Zoloft -- as opposed to standard ADHD meds. Was that for anxiety? Does anxiety have traits that can distinguish it from ADHD? Thanks.
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Have you tried diet changes? Try cutting out all artificial colors and sweeteners from your son's diet, and see if that helps. My son is like a whole other person when he gets artificial colors (emotional, gets into fights, no impulse control). If you aren't comfortable with AD/HD meds, try seeing a naturopathic doctor, who uses homeopathic medicine.
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Thank-you all for your VERY HULPFUL and much needed advice. :)
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I have a 12 year old son with ADHD. He was diagnosed in 3rd grade and we decided to put him on medication. We took him to a specialist in officially diagnosed. Once on meds, his teacher noticed right away his ability to focus and he participated more in classroom activities. He went from failing grades to A's & B's. In fact, he brought home a progress report from school yesterday and he has all A's, a 4.0 gpa! The school (through the special education dept) has him on a 504 Plan so the teachers help him in certain areas (reminders, extra time for testing ....) and set him up with an 'organizational binder' to help him organize his notes, homework, classwork ... that's been very helpful! Being on meds also helps him to complete homework and focus when playing sports. It was a good choice for him, but it needs to be your decision. In the 3 years he's been on medication (Ritalin), he hasn't experienced any side effects. Since he hates to take pills, his doc just switched him to the Daytrona patch (same as Ritalin). We just got it today, but I'll let you know how it works in a week or so. Remember also that your child shouldn't have to suffer, but you need to do what you feel as a parent is best for him. Medication is a big decision, but from what we have experienced, it made a HUGE impact on our sons academics ... very positive. I wish you the best of luck and please keep us posted. If you want to send me a message, I am happy to give you any information I can. I have fought with the school system to get this all going and it was worth it. Good luck!
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MY SON, IS ON ZOLOFT 25 MG (LOWEST DOSE) AND IT HAS BEEN LIKE NIGHT AND DAY HERE. HE IS MED SENSITIVE AND RITALIN PRODUCTS MASE HIM A ZOMBIE. SO WE ARE ON OUR 3 WEEK OF VYVANSE AND HE IS DOING GREAT SO FAR. TEACHER SAYS BETTER, EVERYONE SAYS BETTER YAY! I WOULD NOT DO THIS WITHOUT A CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST TO DIAGNOSE AND A PSYCHIATRIST TO FOLLOW MEDS. GET EVELUATED.
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