As the Economy Suffers So Do Our Emotions
We're living in hard times and I'm worried. Not only about rising cost of gas and food, but the anxiety and depression that often accompanies intense financial pressure.
I live in a suburb of Los Angeles which means that I drive approximately 45 minutes in heavy traffic to work every day. Each morning I either breathe a sigh of relief or grimace depending on where the gas gauge is pointing on my dash.
When I go to the grocery store I think twice before buying certain products. I gawk at the price of milk and eggs and wonder if the cows and chickens are being fed gold infused grain as I can't imagine that grain is that expensive. But apparently even grain has succumbed to these troubled financial times.
On my daily walks with my dog Etta, we assess the neighborhood for new houses put up for sale. I wonder if it's another foreclosure and think there but for the grace of God go I. Although this is not a solution, I wanted to offer some personal thoughts on how to cope with anxiety related to our troubling economy.
Count your blessings. In hard times, even though it's difficult, it's imperative to remember the pieces of your life that endure and/or thrive. Focusing on what you value in your life brings strength and comfort. It also helps to remember that money is not the only thing that makes you worthwhile.
A friend of mine reminded me today about perspective. She said that because of financial pressures, her life feels very negative. She noted the changes in the economy as a main reason. As a therapist, her private practice was slow, as many could not afford therapy. And her financial crunch was trickling down into other parts of her life. Then after a good venting session that I could also relate to, she stopped and changed her focus.
She said "well, I have many blessings in my life and I need to focus on those. It helps me get through." She then talked about how she has, "a great car with good air conditioning (as it has been topping over 100 degrees most days), I have a house that I can afford to pay for and I have a loving spouse." As she flipped her perspective from the negative to the positive her face lightened up and at least for the moment the weight seemed to drop off her shoulders.
Now of course, "happy thoughts" alone are not enough to cure financial worries and it certainly doesn't have the power to lower gas prices. However, taking even small steps towards saving money may help relieve some of the pressure.
Ok I am going to say this publically: I am a coupon clipper--a BIG coupon clipper. In fact, the few friends that know my "secret" often roll their eyes when I talk about it or just plain look at me as if I'm from Mars. Not because I clip, but my attitude about it. I actually find shopping at the grocery store for sale items with my coupons calming and empowering. Sometimes it even feels like a treasure hunt (this is where the eye rolling starts!). I know that I am helping my personal financial cause when I see the savings and that makes me feel less anxious. Check out the grocery game, a wonderful coupon loving website that can help you save money.
Finally, take an honest look at your financial situation and be open to constructive guidance. Doing what may seem the hardest may actually bring the most relief. Most people would rather have a tooth pulled than really look at how much money they owe and how much they spend. But usually, most of the anxiety from financial worries comes from ignoring the situation.
Taking the brave step to access your finances may bring up feelings of shame or fear but ultimately you will feel empowered. And you will have set the stage to really take control of your finances which is imperative in these troubling times.
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8
That's food for thought. Maybe we should list what's good and enduring in our lives. Can I vent? First off, I'm able to go to grad school by the grace of a student loan, I'm realizing a lifelong dream of becoming a teacher. I'm often asked to sub for teachers by name because they know I'm gifted as a teacher even without a full credential. Also, I have a great little son who is not only the apple of my eye, but a calming influence on me, though I'm sure he doesn't know it. Also, somehow we are squeaking by and I'm ever so humbled by my new life that feels like the Gread Depression even if it's only happening to me. I've learned to make the tiny bit I have stretch and when I do have a good meal, it tastes much better than before. Even a trip to McDonalds is okay, which I used to turn up my nose to. So, maybe you have a point. Thanks for listening.
By gr8trgood September 6, 2008 7:43pm
7
I buy things on sale -food
I bought a less expensive car but I love it
I was going to go away for 2 nights- may just take a day at the beach
I walk as mushc as possible to stores and have had to cut back on clothes but I am lucky and thankful for what I have.
I will have to cut back on cable services
I have to stop dating on line- mot working anyway
I have to cut back on amount I spend on gifts.
I bought a condo cheaper then I originally planned
It is tought times and not much hope for gas going down or thnkgs getting better- I work weekends and holidays for extra.
I am going to start looking on sale
By kellie58 July 12, 2008 12:04pm
6
I also play the coupon game, although I have to admit that sometimes I still shop impulsively. It's not good to go to the store hungry. You want everything, especially tasty looking foods that are made in the store and all you have to do is go home and heat them up.
As for your friend and the positive thinking, I've been using this technique for a week now. I picture a red stop sign in my mind as soon as I recognize negative thoughts coming. I accept them. Take a couple of deep breaths from the belly, and then talk soft, positive, comforting words to myself. It really helps.
Like others I'm hitting bad financial times and spent the last few months being anxious and depressed over this. We own two homes, one in NJ and one in NC, and can't sell either. I've dealt with it the best I can (had to take a loan out from my retirement account) and I do watch my financial situation all the time (banking and paying bills on line helps). I try to limit the use of the credit cards and use my debit card instead. This way I see what I actually have left to spend in my account. It's so easy to get caught up in the credit card trap. It seems that we try to pay them down and then some big expense comes along, like just the other day I needed a new hot water heater, $920. It had to go on the credit card. I worried about this for a few minutes and then told myself that it had to be done, sooner or later, and hopefully we'll sell one of the houses and things will get better. Dwelling on future, negative events, which we have no control over, is a waste of time and energy, and inevitably leads to anxiety and depression. I'm learning to live for today and live in the precious present moment.
Thank you for this discussion. I'm hoping it helped others. It helped me.
By laniescherr July 11, 2008 6:01am
5
One way I have tried to help the crunch is cook vegetable soup and different things that you cook in a large quantity and put in containers and freeze. I buy a large can of green beans the large one's like resturants buy and cook it with bacon and onions and I can eat it every night for a week. This large can cost aprx. 4 dollars compared to buying the small ones. You have to be creative about food. Don't go to fast food or pizza delivery, it can be expensive and you could buy alot of groceries for the price of this kind of luxury. Meat is very expensive, and you can buy the cheaper cuts of meat and pressure cook it. I have also grown a garden this year and I have froze cauliflower, broccoli, onions.I have 75 tomatoe plants that I will use all winter. Sounds like a lot of work, it is now my hobby to find a cheaper way to live. You can have your friends over and bring a covered dish instead of going out to eat.
I work for a non profit agency and we find alot of free products online like shampoo, toothpaste, deoderant,we even found some free pocket calendars for our clients. I was inquiring about a job at a dry cleaners for a client and there was a rack of unclaimed clothes that they were selling and I got two Harly Davidson brand dress shirts for a dollar a piece and a docker dress shirt for a dollar. I bought them for a client apposed to going to Wal-Mart to look for cheap clothes. They had all kinds of nice high quality clothes that were unclaimed. I have had my friends over and we ate in the dining room and I used my fine china that i inherited that has set in the china cabinet for years and we thought we were at the ritz!!! Hope I gave someone some hope for some fun in these very tuff times.
Patty G.
By pw123 July 10, 2008 11:22pm
4
I have to say that the grocery game totally stressed me out! (I had done it before, not at your suggestion). I know it works great for some, but it takes a lot of mental energy. Because of the depression / BP that I struggle with, just getting some kind of groceries in the basket that will make an acceptable dinner is a major feat. You keep having fun though!
By MsHyde July 10, 2008 10:40am
3
Julie Awesome article ...... in these times it is too easy to fall into deep depression worrying about what new awful news tomorrow is going to ring in with the sunrise. I also try not to listen to the news that much because it can and will bring you down Again great stuff here
By Dewymoon July 9, 2008 7:40pm
2
Great article. As a single Mother I know only too well, how hard things are. Just being able to afford "healthy" food is a major problem. You can buy a days worth the sallad, or a months worth the Ramen. And it takes a toll on the body. It makes me sad that even in these hard times, some people are clueless as to how seriouse it is for some people. But you are right, We should look at the good in our lives too. I know if I didn't do that, I would go crazy.
By Owshen July 8, 2008 6:55pm
1
and then they want to make it worse by raising minimum wage!!! Thats what gets me. While I agree that education is the answer to poverty, not everyone can afford to go back to school either. If your single living on minimum wage yes you can afford with with FAFSA and other financial assistance, but what about those who are married? Even couples who both only earn minimum wage jobs, can't even afford to have 1 spouse go back to school because FAFSA denies you any help if your married, even if one of you is out of work and the other on minimum wage, so yeah education is nice for the rich, or single poor with 4+ children, but what about everyone else? I think everyone should have a chance to go back to school, no matter how much they make, because getting an education is what taught me how to look on the positive side of life. Only thing about school, is most people are there to make more money, when thats not what the point is in going back to school.
Another thing is spirituality. True Christians are aware that we are here to serve the Lord, not to lust after the materialistic items of this world. Once we are made aware of that, living life in a poor lifestyle is so much easier, its like all our complaints about money and life are lifted from our hearts.
By tcoburn July 8, 2008 4:17pm